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Rising Star
You’re still regulating till like 6 weeks pp I think (though maybe your lactation consultant has deemed you to have “issues” but just in case not).
Anyway I nursed my first 5 months and will do the same ish I think for my second. But I’m putting less pressure on myself this round and we give a bottle of pumped milk for the last feed (I pumped extra the first month and then completely stopped pumping) and once my stash is gone, we will do formula bottle feeds.
Conversation Starter
It took me 8 weeks to establish my supply and stop supplementing!
Adding a second response because i think it’s important to balance real life benchmarks with encouragement to go on the tough days.
My mom support group/ mothers circle always acknowledges that breastfeeding can be *really* hard - no matter how much prep people do prenatal it’s always a shock how challenging it can be. It gets easier once your supply regulates and can be a BEAUTIFUL thing.
Second, it’s a good idea to not make any irreversible decisions on breastfeeding when you’re having a bad day. Find a stretch to have a longer sleep and then double pump to make up for it - that one extra sleep be transformational.
Finally, don’t feel bad about splashing out on all the gear that eases a breastfeeding journey. Lots of great nursing/ pumping bras that you can happily live in 24/7. The best nipple cream, like boobease. A prescription for APNO cream if your nipples are getting damaged. Lots of extra sets of pump parts to reduce number of times you’re washing. A breastfeeding pillow if you need one.
Treat yourself - you deserve!!
Enthusiast
I also found lowsupplymom, pump momma pump accounts on IG very helpful regarding these questions. I am a FTM with no mom friends so my benchmark might be really off but sharing in case it helps
Rising Star
9 months with my first
2 with my second before I was like f*** this
Thank you everyone for sharing your experiences. This really helps. I had a very tough day and was struggling but reading all these messages makes me feel 100 times better.
Like many of you suggested i already met with a LC and am supplementing with formula. I do feel terrible supplementing..I know it’s not a bad thing..I am learning.
Again thank you 🙏
Enthusiast
OP: You post bought tears because I remembered my desperate post right here in this post with exact same situation. Felt terrible to supplement at 1 month but my supply regulated at 12 weeks and now baby at 5 months is exclusively breast fed and I have started building a stash. Please please please, don’t feel guilty. Like you I met with atleast 3 LCs and was taking supplements left right and center and nothing worked. I know how it feels when you visit the pediatrician and they judge you for being formula/combo fed. First 8 weeks are the worst and gradually it gets better. Your mental health is way more important for the baby…
6 months but did a combination of breast feeding and formula since the beginning because I had low supply and baby wasn’t great at nursing. Do what is best for you and helps you maintain your sanity. Giving formula feels like a big deal at the time, especially in the beginning but once you have some distance from it you realize a lot of it is unnecessary pressure
Pro
I combo fed for 7 weeks. Did all the supplements, milk tea, brewers yeast. Pumped every 2-3 hours after BF, proper pumped twice a day…and got ~8oz a day. I gave up all the extra sht and just BF before a formula bottle. My supply dipped to prob 3-4oz/day but I didn’t care. Me and the baby were both getting what we needed. Once he started sleeping through the night (~3mo) my supply took another hit and the baby ended up giving up on me. It felt very natural to stop and I have no guilt.
BF was the hardest thing about being a new mom for me. Drove me insane. I was a monster.
Chief
I had supply issues as well but made it to a year. It is honestly one of the few things I can look back on and say “damn I had grit”. That being said, we supplemented most of that year so absolutely do not worry about being “exclusive” if it’s a pain!
First, please give yourself kudos for persevering this long. Every drop counts. Good for you!
On my first, had supply issues, did extensive overnight pumping to get approx 13oz breastmilk per day + supplemented with formula, and nursed until 7.5months.
Second baby, was producing 90-100% of baby’s need (one formula bottle most days, none some days) but accomplishing that through nursing on demand + 5 pumps per day (6am, 3pm, 9pm, midnight and 3am). Dropped the overnight pumps at 3 months as it was impossible to run around after two all day long whilst never sleeping more than 2.5 hrs in a row.
Glad I did it (I guess??) but not entirely convinced of the value, balancing nutritional value vs mom mental health, as I think formula these days is excellent. Especially on the days you drink wine and eat junk food - is it really magic milk then? … Don’t think so ha :)
With all that said, the 1st month is the hardest! Supply doesn’t regulate for some until 10 weeks. I found it very gratifying and amazing for bonding when I reached that point with my first. I just couldn’t make the trade offs work on my second. The sleeplessness was getting in the way of happy quality time with my toddler.
Just to add - my supply kept increasing until 10 weeks and then it was stable. An LC said it’s just a quirk of my biology apparently. I was making A LOT more at 8 weeks than I was at 4 or 5. Hope that helps!
I made it longer than a year but I remember at 4 weeks thinking I could not go on or so it anymore. I decided to give myself a goal of 6 weeks and 6 weeks passed and I didn’t even remember my goal until a few weeks after that. Something clicked and we got the hang of it. The first few weeks are SO hard and you have a newborn and you’re both learning this new skill. At any point if you decide to switch to formula that is wonderful for you and baby and you will still be a great mom. I only share my experiences as possible encouragement that it can get better. If you want to keep trying, get an appointment with a lactation consultant. Also keep in mind baby’s stomach is so tiny and can’t take that much in yet, so newborns do cluster feeding and frequent feeding. Continuing to nurse is what tells your body there is a demand and to keep producing. Set a goal for yourself of x days or weeks, agree with above to not make a permanent decision in the fog of battle. Take care. 💕
The first few weeks my supply went up and down - huge for a few days, then back down. We supplemented the entire time just so I didn’t waste anything and could make a stash.
That said, I quit at two months for both my kids and have no regrets. It is SO HARD, and fed is best. Your mental health is important too!
I’m still nursing my first baby, a 7 month old. Because of WFH/single mom life I have been exclusively breast feeding (he won’t take a bottle, so no pumping no formula 😩). I Learned the hard way the importance of accepting help and using bottles! If I could go back I’d make it a point to have someone else do a feed regularly, with whatever milk you’re using. A bottle equates to a few hours of freedom sometimes ☺️.
Cheers from another single mom....opposite feeding situation...he needed supplementation from beginning and the gap of my production/his needs grew. I went back to work pumping at 5.5 months. By 6 ish he just chose to stop nursing. Heartbreaking but ce la vie. He’s gone from preemie to 97th percentile for height and weight so it’s all good five years in.
Chief
Starting off to say fed is best! If it’s not the right choice for you, switch to formula or combo feeding and don’t look back!
That said, if breastfeeding is what you want to do, you CAN do it! It is so so so hard with your first baby, especially in the first few weeks. I felt overwhelmed and worried I wasn’t feeding enough or doing it ‘right’. I ended up nursing my first to 18 months and it got SO MUCH EASIER. After a few months I never even thought about it, except for the PITA that is washing pump parts/pumping. Hate pumping.
Have you found an in person LC that you click with? That was the key for me. I made multiple appointments until I was confident
Hang in there mama! Your supply will regulate in the next month or so. I know it's hard not to stress (been there), but remember stress only makes supply worse. If you don't have enough supply just supplement with formula - nothing wrong with that. Scientific research has shown breastfed babies and formula fed babies do not show any major difference in terms of health and academic achievement.
Hang in there. With my first, I breastfed (and struggled mightily) for six months, triple feeding, supplementing, and hating feeding the baby. I wish I had quit earlier and just enjoyed my kid! Second and third times were much easier, and I made it to almost a year with each one.
Just remember, your self worth comes from so much more than your breasts!
Supply issues. Killed myself for 4 months trying to exclusively BF. Started supplementing after 4 months and babe got about 75% BM and making peace with that was a lifesaver. I stopped pumping at 10 months and only nursed morning/night/overnight. Stopped totally right around a year (we were planning to get pregnant again soon and I knew I needed a break).
A1, around 10 months I did. On weekends I nursed before nap as well if he wanted it but usually after the bottle more for comfort as I don’t think I had enough supply to get him the amount he needed. But it was a really relaxed time and I’m so glad I kept those couple a day!
13 months with my first. I almost threw in the towel so many times those first 6 weeks. It was SO hard. We even had to give formula in the hospital her first week of life. I never thought I’d be able to BF. But I did, and it became the easiest/most beautiful experience. Of course, don’t be too hard on yourself if it doesn’t work that way. Your baby will be FINE and you can bond with them in so many ways - cuddle time! Cheek to cheek! Skin to skin! But I do think it’s worth persevering through those down days.