Related Posts
Happy Project Management Day!!
What is your least favorite kind of client?
More Posts
SOS I don’t care about my job anymore 🥲
What is appraisal cycle and leave Cycle @Kyndryl
Happy Project Management Day!!
Additional Posts in Female Bosses
Have a coffee.
New to Fishbowl?
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
This is not advice but I’m super annoyed that they would ask u that
Your colleague should have made it clear to the client that your ability to carry children in your womb has nothing to do with your ability to lead this project. Shame on him for not nipping it in the bud himself.
That’s honestly so rude and I’m so sorry
Say that you heard people were interested in hearing whether you were pregnant or not, and mention that you don’t want to steal the spotlight. Then, go around the room and have each client say whether or not they’re pregnant. Sorry, I get sassy when I’m pissed off, I understand their curiosity and as a result I’m so sorry they couldn’t ask you to your face.
Clients get away with murder. What an ass. Nip it in the bud and say publicly your tubes are tied or whatever.
I’m not an MD/Partner, so can’t appreciate pulls and pressures at that level. At my level though, I would never say anything related to pregnancy, just because someone is stupid enough to think I might be pregnant, when I’m not. I will just be myself, carrying on as if I didn’t know anything about this pregnancy concern, expecting the client will want me on the engagement for my awesomeness, and if that causes him to ask me about it directly, I will handle the question then.
Agree with Manager 1. I would not dignify the speculation with a direct response. To disabuse the client of their notions, maybe you could rather drop in a detail or two about your involvement in different phases of the project.
You back channel that - don’t do it in the meeting.
EY2 - Agree completely. But in my experienve most male PPEDs make us do our own dirty work and defend our gender!! ☹
But agree, after thinking about it, back channeled back to the client, while inefficient, is the least intrusive to the team. Anything else would be too aggressive and not well perceived - no real benefit.
When you are pitching and storytelling connect with the client by mentioning your family, your kids and reiterate your commitment to this client/project throughout the project timeline. No need to mention other details. As you engage more with that account they will eventually understand they were wrong in their initial perception.
So interesting point of views. Thanks everyone.
It is a massive project ($800mm capex spend) for the client, and I’ve met them several times. They do value my experience and knowledge but it will be a team of partners that deliver together.
To me, it just seemed such a ridiculous/inappropriate ask or perhaps a massive blind spot. Just because a woman in her 30s is leading part of your project doesn’t mean she is going to decide to get pregnant. Why is that the assumption? Trying to not internalize it and stop eating all together!!!
Personally, I would wonder if the client’s judgment demonstrated by his/her back-channel question is sufficient to lead the project. Holding that aside, I personally would not address this. However, I would say and always say my role, such as I’m accountable for our team and our mutual success and I’m available to you 24/7 for the duration of our effort together. (Available 24/7 does not mean on site 24/7.).
Or, if I’m in an executing role, I’m responsible for the day-to-day leadership that is typically x days a week on site. While we work together, I will have 2 clients (or whatever it is). (Obviously, these are examples of answers to the business owners, not Procurement.).
Thanks for the update—i understand your venting btw, although at the same time, to defend the women in their 30s who are leading a project and want to get pregnant (Sheryl Sandburg mentions leaning in right before pregnancy so that you’re more motivated/excited to get back into the workforce post partum), that’s still not a question that should be asked behind their backs. Feminism is work moms supporting stay at home moms so stay at home moms can support work moms and vice versa.
I’m so sorry you have to deal with that but at least it was the client asking. I’ve had internal managers (men) ask if I was pregnant to my direct project manager and CC, twice. I’m not large and don’t have much of a stomach, plus wear clothes that hide any remaining tummy.
^I can relate. Internal men can be the most ignorant and out of line!
Awe glad to know EY and Accenture men are equal in being idiots :-) I should pretend I am preggo with a 3rd next time someone asks just to gauge if I can be placed on a project
I would not dignify with an answer. If you are an asset - the client will adjust accommodate in every way eventually. It’s not their place to ask and the male partner is an ass to bring this back to you. Ignore and not respond. Play from a position of power that doesn’t require you to defend your personal choices, pregnant or not.
I would absolutely not address this at all during the pitch. How did it go???
We won the pitch. Launching on Monday. We’re 4 months in and after 2 global roadshows, it’s clear to everyone that I’m not expecting. Didn’t address it - just told them I was committed and showed them what that meant.