{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "How would you explain to a child what you do for a living?", "post_id": "60fa1594e74c32002e3f5228", "reply_count": 16, "vote_count": 1, "bowl_id": "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d051", "bowl_name": "Consulting" }

How would you explain to a child what you do for a living?

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I can answer that…for money.

likefunnysmart

I am a white collar fraud.

likefunny

I’m a doctor for companies. A doctor takes care of people and their health, daddy takes of the companies’ health and products.

likehelpful

Lmao worst comparison I’ve ever seen. More like, a natural homeopathic social influencer. I’ll sell you stuff that might make you feel better but ultimately won’t work and will leave you asking for more bs cures.

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I yell at people for being stupid… so pay attention in school and get good grades.

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Poeple pay me to break into their computers…

uplifting

Business doctor or business stylist (if you do design agency work )

Your friend has 5 jellybeans at home and wants to trade you for 2 twizzlers. The jellybeans are at home so he says he will give them to you later but wants the twizzlers now. How do you know your friend really has the 5 jelly beans?. I go in and make sure he’s telling the truth. Like that…but with big companies that pay lots of money for which I get jellybeans in my paycheck.

I’m a doctor for big companies. I help heal them.

“It mostly amounts to band-aids and NSAIDs, though, because they often don’t like to listen.”

likefunny

I work with computers and data

People pay me to wipe their company’s bum because they aren’t good at getting very clean.

I fix problems

I help the government pay less for its new toys.

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