How/When did you become assertive enough to sound like you know what you’re doing/talking about? With clients, opposing counsel, employee. How did you learn to be a good/assertive employer?

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It’s tough when you are just starting out, but keep in mind it won’t be that way forever. On the flip side, you sometimes get grace that more seasoned attorneys are not afforded.

Be assertive when you need to be and humble when you need to be. Ask for what you want. You kill more flies with honey than with vinegar.

The key to assertiveness is to be able to back whatever you say. If you threaten to file sanctions then you need to be ready to file. If that makes you uncomfortable then don’t make the threat.

Kindness can make up for incompetence sometimes. If people like you they are sometimes appreciative enough that you aren’t a jerk that they won’t fight that continuance you need that they know you have no good grounds to request, for instance.

For employees, when things are stressful, roll up your sleeves and help when they are really struggling so they know you have their backs. Don’t throw them under the bus even if they did something wrong. Handle it (or ask them to propose a solution to handle it) and then circle back for correction and further explanation/teaching. This is the path to loyalty.

But, if the action you take will be painful (like telling a client the firm (you) messed something up), feel free to have the person who actually messed up at your elbow observing that action so they get the full impact of why that mistake is so painful.

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Let your work product do the talking. If others don't pay attention now, they will pay attention when your filings, oral arguments, and other work win or give them trouble. Build that reputation and the rest will follow.

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Side note: I got licensed 6 months ago and am 5 months into solo/small firm practice (to note: there is one other attorney, a receptionist, an intern and paralegal as part of my firm)

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2-3 years licensed. Back up your assertions with the law and nobody will second guess you.

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