I am 32 f. Finally ready to settle down. How do I find guys to meet. What do desi guys look for in a future wife? Yes it’s a serious question - any help would be good. Or even what should I ask f...

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Awww M1 and OP, time to exchange burners among yourselves.

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OP: you are getting response from all guys. 🙋‍♀️here and married for 4 .. so , here you go. First of all don't try to be guy's choice - make the guy to be your choice. I am not saying this to get a upper hand, saying this so that you know if you want the guy to be your life partner. Many folks here said that wife should be independent, not nagging etc which is true but what they forgot to mention is that they should also support their wife if she wants to support family back home and not interfere in that case. In my opinion, if you are looking to settle down - go out on dates, understand the guy, see if you guys click, discuss future plans and responsibilities and if everything works out then voila you got a happy life. Life is not a bed of roses and there will be ups and downs in marriage - but what you need is a life partner who you can trust and who will be by your side no matter what and vice versa. Good luck!

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30, M. I expect my future wife to be career focused (should have a job so that she can be financial independent), confident, good looking, and most importantly she should be kind enough. I have seen few ladies who don’t like and keep nag their husbands if they take care of their parents, or families.. I am supporting family back at home, I cannot accept if she interferes..

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Until you figure this out, wana grab some dinner/drinks?

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Guys also want someone who is loving and caring. Frequencies should match. Salary, height, weight, and skin tone are not that relevant.

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OP - M here.. figure out your priority list first. What you can accept in a person and what you can’t. Finding right person is not rocket science. i.e if you/him have to argue on your basic needs and can’t listen ( I’m not saying agree with each other) to each other in basic conversation than you not going to make good pair. In a conversation one doesn’t have to win all the time.. all you need is patience to listen and be able to have decent conversation.. once that happens all that taking care of family, helping each other will fall in place... Most important to me is don’t play your feminism card on every dam thing.. i.e when I say you should be able to cook than it doesn’t mean “Female belongs to Kitchen” it means if you are dam human being you should be able to take care of yourself and this applies to both gender.. I’m saying this because as a man I can do every damn thing a woman can do except super power of giving birth and feeding a kid.. I proudly say that because I took care of my wife during her pregnancy without having any of our parents at home...

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P1: I agree 100%. Since Op asked guys opinion, I said my side of preferences. I did not mean that girl cannot interfere, nag but guy can.

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As someone who has been married for long and in a long term relationship very young, I have realized that what you don’t want/ will not tolerate is sometimes more important than what you want. I’m not saying don’t think about your values and what you want but remember it might be too extensive a checklist and you might end up wanting to flexible. On the flip side there may be things that you just are not willing to compromise on. Be more clear on those and make sure to communicate them.

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Try Hinge or msg me ...I’m also looking for a partner. 31 M NYC :)

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M5 and all - to me it’s about understand not about changing. Of course I have dated but I have not exclusively dated Indian guys. And I’m sure there’s a wide difference amongst people - like I legit understand all of these common sense things. But if you can understand the point of the question which is I’m just trying to get some thoughts from the various Indian men on the board that are either in a LT relationship or married or I guess single and looking as well into what they actually consider as important things when finding a spouse. I just really wanted to see the thoughts out there even if they vary. Like what are each persons too 5 things they really care about. GO!

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OP - there are many things. Mostly related to family and future.

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M here, married for 3 years. Knowing your own values is most important before embarking on finding a partner. What I mean by that is understanding what type of person are you. Only when you’re clear about that can you understand what you’re looking for in a partner. At the end of the day, mutual trust and respect matters the most. Good luck!

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OP, M1 says what most desi guys describe they are looking for. I hope you see all the red flags in there.

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What is a fasting site K1? Did you mean dating? I just want to reiterate the question is not how to find someone to get married but rather I wanted to hear the expectations and likes/dislikes of various desi man - married or single - hope that clarifies

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OP out of curiosity, what are you going to do once you collect the data on expectations and likes/ dislikes of desi men? Would you change your expectations based on that? Just trying to understand the point of this question.

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For a successful marriage both of you need to follow path of Dharma, there is no other secret sauce, but then that's a lot of easier said than done.

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Ask for a good partner choice - to me this is equal helper, caring, honest. I don’t really care about salary or background, etc. just want someone who is a great partner in marriage.

Op: do you know what kind of person you want ? ‘Want someone who is a great partner' is too broad. Define a value system for you and so that you can see who fits into that..

What are the many things m3 - I’d love to know your value systems. I’m not trying to see if mine is wrong/right, but what desi guys think. M1those are some good ideas.

You better start dating and testing waters before it’s too late. Otherwise if it is going to be an arranged marriage, it will all come down to luck.

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