I am realising that “being happy at work” is a myth, and the whole love what you do stuff is also BS. Novelty wears off eventually. I guess job/work is something I’ll have to do if I want to be able to afford the luxuries of life and I’ll need to find happiness elsewhere. Does anyone else feel the same way? I don’t want to be negative but I feel I need to change something somewhere.

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I've often felt loving what you do and having passion for work is BS too, but I think that is a little naive and requires more nuance. I do think there are true constraining obligations that happen at a certain time in ones life - eg you need to live closer to sick relative so accept a new job that isn't as good of a fit. In my case my partner lost her job and we had our first child slightly after, I switched careers to pay the bills from research in a field I had advanced degrees in to an industry job. Made 3x as much but without the interest in doing the new job, lots of stress came with that move too. I think the important thing is to identify constraining obligations and then explore the available space within that - there's probably a lot more opportunity within then you may realize. The other response to your original post hinted at ways to do that quite beautifully through imagining options. Even within a current job you feel you don't like, think of those parts that you're grateful for. In my case I've learned to enjoy parts of my job and have realized I can still be creative and build new "things" albeit in a completely different fashion. I've learned to enjoy my relationships at work too, especially since I don't have many outside of work. My job does pay the bills, I'm thankful for that, and while there's probably a better fit out there (eg being a self employed digital nomad traveling the world), I know better then to spend my life searching for a perfect fit out of fear of not having a perfect fit. Instead I work towards my interests (building my tech skills to be a nomad) and will see what comes of it. Some people feel the grass is always greener and bounce around for perfection (in jobs, relationships, etc), and I think the drumbeat of "finding passion in your job" encourages this because most people probably don't associate as being passionate for their job...a negative feedback loop where HR/leadership tries to motivate us by saying we should be passionate, but we just get bummed out and less motivated because we think we aren't, due to lack of "perfect" fit. The idea of "passion" often incites that belief that there's this one perfect job out there we just need to find, and that's true BS. Finding joy and gratitude - those ephemeral rays of sunshine - in what you have is really really tough at times, but I'm starting to believe more and more in that being a key mental shift to living a more fulfilled life.

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I think you can summarize that entire rambling reply to "think glass half full instead of half empty, easier said than done, but we need to work towards getting there"

That’s where I am having trouble, understanding if it’s general attitude towards work/job or it’s consulting that is making me feel that way. I have ups and downs, but can’t really label the ups as satisfaction. The company and culture is great, but can’t get over the “trapped” feeling, which I am assuming is not consulting specific. Don’t know if I am making any sense.

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Hey I'll add that I did this and over a few years my life changed top to bottom! Moved my family across the country for a new job and I'm so I'm love with the life we have now... Getting the fam on board and settled was what took the most time and effort 🙂 all worth it. They are grateful now that I pushed them to dream bigger and expand their comfort zone.

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