I am recovering from a painful surgery that I had last night and am staying with my parents for a few days as a result (we live in the same city). My sister also lives in the same city and invited herself over and wants to bring her husband—whenever they come over it turns into a party and everyone drinks a ton. I am still weak and not ready to see people and told my sister that maybe she and my BIL should come another time. Told my parents this and now they’re mad at me. Is this wrong of me?

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Stay in your room and don’t party? Hope you recover quickly

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I mean, it’s their house but I think this is BS.

Tell them you’ll be staying in your room and not joining any partying or visits.

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Can your sister and husband come over to my place and party? I have been by myself and feeling so low.

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This!! I wish I had this, haven’t seen my siblings or parents in almost 2 years

I wonder how you told them that you don’t want to have anyone over. If you were annoyed and irritated when you told them that, that’s probably why they reacted like that. It is also not your house but if you asked nicely I don’t see why would they not be understanding

I am confused…. Who would party, your parents, sister and BIL?

Maybe they want to come over to support you? Did you ask if it could be a movie night?

Hope you recover soon. I think your parents have reasons to be mad because it is their house. You also made a set of assumptions about what your sister and BIL would do where in reality they could have been considerate that you just had surgery (you know them so you probably have reasons to believe how they would act despite the circumstances so not necessarily suggesting you did anything wrong by anticipating). You probably could have stayed in your room and not made a call whether their daughter gets to come to their house. I know my parents would be upset if my sister told me to not come without checking with them. They would consider it to be not her place.

You’re not being unreasonable. I’m on the receiving end in my family of parents/sibling not respecting my time or boundaries and you need some rest! There’s a reason you’re bothered, it’s happened before. Take some deep breaths, don’t engage right now, feel better, and process later.

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