{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "I feel like I have Stockholm syndrome about my firm. I am in fifth year biglaw and every time I think about leaving, I talk myself out of it and or feel too burnt out to make the effort. I may end up staying forever. Any inspiring stories? Advice?", "post_id": "6109f4d95934120029423bc9", "reply_count": 9, "vote_count": 10, "bowl_id": "552d1d24dc1c586b09d2d052", "bowl_name": "Law" }

I feel like I have Stockholm syndrome about my firm. I am in fifth year biglaw and every time I think about leaving, I talk myself out of it and or feel too burnt out to make the effort. I may end up staying forever. Any inspiring stories? Advice?

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I felt like this for 6 years. I finally took the plunge and started applying to go somewhere else and I have a final interview! It is a liberating feeling, even if I don’t get the job. I say apply to jobs, you can always turn them down if they aren’t a good fit! Always helpful to have options. Good luck OP!

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Associate1 and Attorney1, yes these are all to in house place! Bc I’m a pure litigator the in house search has been slightly harder as I see many more corporate jobs. But, I still apply to them! I even got an interview for one and they thought I was a great candidate minus the lack of transactional experience which was understandable. I thought for a long long time I wanted to make partner at my firm and stay in private practice. But after multiple nights where I was getting calls at 6pm to turn something around the same night, having worked thanksgiving and Xmas eve and the constant 24/7 grind where I have never not worked on vacation, etc. I was ready for something else. And before people start telling me “I need to set boundaries,” those simply were not in play. There were specific emergency situations with a client where something had to be filed that day that even the client didn’t know about until that day, and the partners were working just as hard as I was to get it done. I just saw the constant grind the partners were doing too, sometimes at the expense of their families, and I realized I don’t want that to be my future. I would say, look 20-30 years down the road and see what your life will look like, and see what the life the partners at your firm lead. If you think you’ll be happy, then stay. If not, gtfo like I’m trying to do🤣

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I know the feeling very well. I’d reach out to another associate from your firm who left and just have a chat with them (if they did it, you can do it too). Take the first step of updating your resume. Have a chat with a recruiter…even if you don’t end up using one or that particular one, hearing about all the other opportunities available to you can be uplifting.

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Think about whether you’re just afraid to take the next step. Are you just taking the path of least resistance? Not judging, but I found myself doing that years ago. Then I stopped.

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