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I had to lose $50k in settlement, but I’m finally free from my cheating, money grabbing ex husband. I’m sick to lose most of my bank account but ready for a new beginning... Fellow divorced ladies, what’s the first thing you did to celebrate you?

likeuplifting
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1st divorce - went skydiving
2nd divorce - applied to and was accepted to a doctoral program, drank a lot champagne and danced to Foo Fighters and Queen, expanded my shoe and purse collection, went after that next promotion and got it

Congrats on your new found freedom and your newly restored single status. No more dragging that dead weight around and calling it a relationship!

likeupliftingsmart

I’ve been blasting music he hated so YAS! Also hoping to get a promotion next year. Cheers to you as well for getting rid of dead weight!

likeuplifting

One month out - met my ex for a post-divorce lunch and, to my surprise, met his new significant other, a man. That explained a lot of things.

likefunnyupliftinghelpful

Did all the things my ex didn’t like me doing or was too cheap to do:

Travel. Took a month off and travelled from Berlin to Prague to Vienna. Stayed with my mom in California for a few weeks.
Appearance: Cut my hair and dyed it. Got that boob lift and lipo. Gave away clothes and bought a new, younger, look. Invested in Botox, Ferragamo’s and tailored pants.
Health: Got a personal trainer. Started eating better. Stopped drinking beer.

I didn’t set out to reinvent myself. I just felt like all the “No’s” and “Maybe later’s” of the past several years became irrelevant.

Also, consider the $50K and investment in your own sanity. I basically walked away from my house and capitulated to everything just so I could be free. It turned real petty too. Like he thought I’d fight him. You want the car I paid for? Cool. Here are the keys. Surprised him but honestly I just couldn’t muster up any shred of caring at that point.

likehelpful

I loved when I got to the f*ck-its. It was so freeing. And I don’t know about you, but both my exes seemed to think I would love them forever and would want to make sure they were taken care of. That f*ck-it was like a light switch. Sorry, the caring has been turned off and you no longer have access to that emotional bank account. In fact, that account has been closed because you are overdrawn. Bye, Felicia!

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You know why divorce is expensive? It’s worth it.

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“Just because I’m happy to pay it doesn’t mean I’m happily paying it.”

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Bought a pair of burgundy colored suede stiletto boots and, a little later, a second house in my “happy place” (which happens to be in a place he hates, but that was beside the point).

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1,000 cartwheels

Any advice you’d give women to avoid an ex like yours?

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OP - sounds exactly like my ex! Good for you that you got rid of him.

Got lip injections, micro blading, botox, and all the other things my ex complained about. Moved into an all glass high rise. Then got a boyfriend. Whoops.

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I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face after it was all over. I literally told everyone I met after I left court. 😂 then went to fancy restaurant and ordered a steak. It was 11am but whatever.

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Invest in yourself! Get laser, get your hair done, enroll in a hobby class, just focus on being a better and happier you

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I dyed my hair two weeks after he moved out and have started making friends he would have never let me make 😊.

YES! Got divorced at 26 and it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Here’s what I recommend for your glorious freedom:

Travel. Alone if possible.
Go to restaurants alone, order whatever you want, people watch.
Buy whatever furniture you want.
Chase a goal - marathon, career step, whatever. Just something that he was holding you back from.
Hobbies! So many hobbies!

I’m happily remarried now to an amazing man, but I still look back on that newly-divorced phase with some nostalgia. I’d never been so happy or so free 🥲

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