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Subject Expert
My son is similar so I try to just be present with him fully from 6-8pm. Is that possible for you? Honestly I’ve found that even 10 minute chunks of “I am here fully playing with you or cuddling you” give him the connection he needs for me to be able to take a break and do the next thing. Quality over quantity for me! And extra snuggles in the morning. I let my son come to our room everyday around 5am and we get our last 90 minutes of sleep together in bed.
Subject Expert
21 months is a tough age. Things get better at 24 months+ so hang tight. If someone else can do daycare pick up and take him to the playground for 45 minutes, that will give you time to wrap up. Then I would suggest putting a block on the calendar from 6-8 to give him whatever attention he needs. Hop back online for an hour after he goes to bed to get organized for the next day and then call it a day.
I totally understand. My 2.5 year and 7 month old come crashing in the house at exactly 5:30 and then it’s impossible to work until 8:30 once they are sleep.
Coach
Could your husband be a stay at home dad or work part time? Or he could step up in the evenings so it's not just on you all the time.
Otherwise a nanny or au pair would help a lot with entertaining and watching him.
He's also at a tough age where he's reaching a lot of developmental milestones so I think that's definitely making it tougher.
He’s at a high maintenance age, nothing unusual with this behavior. Set aside family time in the evenings and then work for an hour or so after he goes to bed. You might also consider a flexible work option for a year or two before he goes to pre-K. I promise it’s temporary! Hang in there
In my case, even though my husband spends a lot of the with our son and distracts him when I need to work, I am still my son's go-to person for everything. He needs mom. My husband takes him to the park after daycare so I'd have time to do more work and have a little time for myself. But then I feel guilty for not giving enough time to my baby. I don't know if there is a way around it for women in public accounting. There is just always more work. I work after my son goes to sleep, after 9:30 pm but then I am tired in the morning. I would love some advise too
Agree with all recs above. Possible temporary flex work arrangement and getting someone to take him to the park for about 45 mins- an hour should give you more breathing room! And if your sanity is going out the window you can try to get a "night off" sometimes if you can, where you go out (gym, library, bookstore, whatever!) and come home to do bedtime only...or even after bedtime.
I’m sorry. At that age they are all high maintenance. I had my son while In law school and I struggled like you. I had to wait until he went to sleep to study. Hang in there.