I have a colleague who always shows up on our morning meetings with wet hair from where it’s clear she just got out of the shower before the call. Our manager took her aside and apparently told her that it didn’t look professional on client video meetings. I wouldn’t have even known or thought about it but someone else in our team was talking about it. It seems like a nonevent but I am curious what everyone else is thinking about experiences and expectations for dress on client video calls?

Say you are looking to move houses? And a real estate agent schedules a meeting with you to understand your needs and recommend some places. (Basically you are the client).

If the agent shows up with wet hair and they are brilliant at the job, very good in building trust with you, asks great questions, have done their research both on your needs and the types of places you provided in your brief, provides you deep insights into the market and gives you the top recommendations that you feel are spot on with your needs. Would you do business with them? Would the wet hair matter?

My hypothesis is this: only reason this is bothering you or the manager is simply because you yourself won't show up in a meeting with wet hair hence you expect others to behave like you. But the reality is different for all of us. So maybe we need to focus on the outcomes and now how someone gets there.

Others may feel the same way for your untrimmed beard, your excessive nodding, your spectacles - we as humans are brainwashed to be critical of others and find what's wrong with others.

Imagine what your world will look like if you find what's right with people vs what's wrong with them. Try this out name 5 things that person (with wet hair) does well (try the same for your spouses, your children, your manager, your client) - you'll see how the psychological drama that is going on in your head (your version of reality) starts to change for the better. DM me if you want a reframe :p

Hmmm. I have extremely long curly hair which is definitely a pain to schedule wash days around on camera meetings etc.

I think that soaking wet hair is definitely something to avoid, but sometimes can’t be helped.

For example, ad hoc meetings sometimes come up and i just happen to have just gotten out of the shower, or finished a midday workout (best part of quarantine in my opinion) so all I can do is throw on a button down and try to look as presentable as possible in a short amount of time.

I also think that the way your manager went about it was wrong. I’m highly supportive of a team wide “hi guys, now that we seem to be doing webex for the long haul, here are some video chat guidelines management feels it’s best we all follow” and then follow up with a one on one if the issue persists.

I certainly wouldn’t call anyone out on wet hair, but I know some clients are picky about that sort of thing

So this is what gendered micro-aggressions look like in the workplace

Clients are not to see anything that reminds them of your humanity; i.e., wet hair, food, coffee, family members, art on the wall, pets, your smile, motion or other facial expressions of any kind, or changes in skin tone resulting from momentary increase in blood pressure due to systolic heartbeat. Please address or we will need to discuss your staffability going forward.

In all seriousness, that sucks and I don’t think is by any means universal. It depends on the client and leadership team.

Can we all take a moment to applaud her for showering. With very early AM meetings now being scheduled, no daycare, and a toddler at home, I’m lucky to brush my teeth and show up without my son’s breakfast smeared on my shirt. I’d be proud of wet hair. People need to get over this shit.

I have shown up with wet hair to a client in person, many times. I don't get what the issue probably could be.

I am a woman with hair that takes a fair bit of time to dry and style. There are tons of alternatives to wet hair that are professional for a client call. I’m not a boomer...I think it’s unprofessional to present to a client that way. It’s pretty similar to a man showing up with 5 o clock shadow or an unkempt beard. Not professional, and not a gendered attack.

What’s normal in 2020 just isn’t the same so norms are shifting. Consulting has a lot of 80s hangover in terms of culture so I’m on team wet hair on this one because we’re human after all. You can’t work people like dogs at all hours then control their shower schedule on top of it. Also most of the time when people talk about what’s professional they usually need to get the stick out of their ass

I just quit my job at consulting and my life is instantly better

This should have never been an issue. Sounds like a manger who puts lots of stock in appearance matters.

I agree it’s not the best look, but is she dressed otherwise professionally? Perhaps she could just pull it back into a low bun for the client call and dry it after.

If she has curly hair, she shouldn't be drying her hair. Hope she takes this to HR. Manager's behavior is out of line - we're in the middle of the pandemic and we have bigger fish to fry.

Sexist and an ego-trip by manager

Now imagine getting your work reviewed by this psycho.... Anyone dedicating time to hair moisture surveillance does not know how to prioritize

1. Hair can take 6+ hrs to dry if long and curly
2. I’m up and at it by 7 at least if not 6am to get some uninterrupted work hours but might take a mid day shower when I’ve got a 15 min break 🤷🏼‍♀️ sue me

I think one of the most refreshing moments of this pandemic was seeing client leadership lead video calls in tshirts sporting touseled hair and an unshaved face. It gave the rest of us permission to relax and acknowledge this wasn't business as usual.

I really don't see the big deal with joining a Zoom call with wet hair unless its literally so wet its dripping and distracting everyone lol

Why does it matter, at least they showered? 😂

Does this affect the job?

No way am I ever having this conversation with one of my employees. Did she show up in time? Is she a solid contributor? Those are the only two questions that matter. I don’t know if you all heard but this is a strange time for our industry and humanity. No one cares as long as you do the work well. That’s the only thing that matters.

P.S. some women put product in their hair that makes it look like it’s wet all day. Was anyone complaining about that? It does not matter one bit.

JFC, we are in the middle of a major global pandemic, and people are nitpicking about this? 🙄

What time of day is this, client local time and employee resource time? I have some resources that are pushing the boundaries showing up to calls where it's evident they just woke up and it's after 10 AM local time but they are consistently logged off right at 5 local time. The perception that the wet hair is a product of starting your day later than everyone else could be what's going on but if it's 6am local time or something 👏give👏it👏a👏 rest 👏boomers👏