I have a friend I used to be close with but we’ve grown apart over the years. She hasn’t worked in several years yet supports herself in NYC, focusing most of her energy on dating. Only wealthy men. Recently she had a fling w a guy for a couple months and got pregnant. They had a huge fight and broke up, she was distraught, and I impulsively offered to fly to NY for her abortion so she wouldn’t have to be alone. Then I found out she basically blackmailed him to pay her almost $100k (contd)

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Maybe she doesn’t care about having you there anyway. Breach the topic, see the reaction, and back out (and eventually out of the friendship? If you feel that way).

Or, it doesn’t matter. It’s still a friend and it’s still a tough time for her. Whichever way you feel

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You join my high school crush as the second person to call me out for a language error. I contended in an English class when I was 14 that “confess” is always negative. And she said, with 45 other students and the teacher there that “no, what about if you’re confessing your love to someone”

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I’m generally against the advice of cutting people out of your life as I think it’s a self-centered way to deal with relationship problems, but this is sadistic. Back out and cut her out of your life. This person is fundamentally selfish and diabolically manipulative. Only way she can learn to improve herself is if she is left on her own.

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Thank you… it’s not something I can openly talk about with people I know, but I’m glad I’m not alone in considering this response

Why would he agree to this? She can decide to have the baby and go after him for child support after taking the $100k.

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It was the cause of the breakup I think. Obviously she didn’t divulge until after I offered to go. He’s also going to be there to make sure she goes through with it, or something. I’d thought he’d just kinda ghosted and was a jerk but now I’m second guessing all of that. It feels like a crazy situation, or else I’m really sheltered and was oblivious to this kind of thing happening

She made him pay her nearly $100k for the abortion and “to take care of herself”. She also used natural family planning to avoid pregnancy (no birth control, no condoms, just trying to plan around cycle). After learning these details I am sick to my stomach. I want to back out of going and don’t want to be involved?

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Find better "friends"

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Yeah no, don’t go

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