{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "I have a hard time getting along with my future mother in law. She likes to talk about money, judging people/me and I never heard her compliment others. I understand it maybe her culture and background make her that way. But every time after she visited us I am extremely unhappy. She is picky about food I make, always want things changed in my house etc. Herself is not wealthy like she acts so maybe that’s why she comes off that way? She visits us quite often and I don’t know what to do…", "post_id": "618967e988593b0025fc57a1", "reply_count": 8, "vote_count": 5, "bowl_id": "58f7fc5fae9f610010f862d9", "bowl_name": "Women in Accounting", "feed_type": "bowl" }

I have a hard time getting along with my future mother in law. She likes to talk about money, judging people/me and I never heard her compliment others. I understand it maybe her culture and background make her that way. But every time after she visited us I am extremely unhappy. She is picky about food I make, always want things changed in my house etc. Herself is not wealthy like she acts so maybe that’s why she comes off that way? She visits us quite often and I don’t know what to do…

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Set boundaries now. My mother in law and I do not get along but I have set specific boundaries and made it clear that I will not be treated poorly. I have a daughter now and remind myself that it’s okay to set boundaries with toxic family members because if it was my daughter I would want her to do the same. Also, I kind of look at it as a blessing because now I know exactly the type of mother in law I don’t want to be. Lol

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All of these!! Mine is toxic! My husband always stuck up for her, but she showed him her true colors. She’s still his mother, but he understands the wall I have built to keep her at a distance from us and our children. This same woman cried when he moved out and would call him to help her do things (get the mail) when we lived 30 minutes away…. Now we live 10 minutes away and we don’t hear from her. Thank goodness!!

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She is your SO's problem, and your SO can go visit her at her place and future mother in law doesn't need to come over to yours. I hope you don't need her for any future babysitting.

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This is how I approach my sister in law and it works swimmingly.

Stick up for yourself. Culture is not an excuse to be rude.

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Move further away….this would affect your future marriage for sure and you need to speak to your future husband about how you feel. It’s very important to see how he reacts/handles this kind of stuff too

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Move...and don't give her your new address! Seriously, she sounds like many MILs which is why there are so many jokes on that topic. Don't let her get to you and just let her ridiculous criticisms wash over you. If it gets too much, restrict her visits or go out when she turns up.

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