I have a problem, I over explain myself and when I do it with my women colleagues I think they get the impression that I'm mansplaining to them. I started the habit because I ran into an issue where a lot of people often weren't sure what I was talking about and I'm trying to be nice and explain it up front so things are absolutely clear. Is there a way to do this where I don't run the risk of offending my colleagues? I certainly don't mean to imply incompetence.

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As someone who is frequently on the receiving end of mansplaining (as a female and non-attorney), I generally appreciate if someone starts off with a disclaimer that they’re an over-explainer by nature and to just tell them if I already know what they are talking about. A few years ago I started at a new firm at the same time as the associate I supported and we were both remote. He was always so kind and respectful about wanting to make sure I was in the loop while also not really knowing my prior experience and knowledge. By starting off by saying I could interrupt at any point it took the pressure off both of us and we ended up working incredibly well together.

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Paralegal 1 is spot on, it takes all the pressure off from both sides, and even if you do know something sometimes it’s nice to hear it again or make you think about it a different way. A disclaimer like the one they are talking about is a perfect level setting.

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The root of the issue (i.e., others not knowing what you’re talking about) is likely that you’re not direct enough. Practice getting to the point (tactfully) without circling around it.

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Take a course in effective communication. It may help you speak with influence and stay clear + concise.

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People who ramble seem incompetent to the person they’re speaking to more than the other way around. Think before you speak to compose what you’ll say and be succinct.

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Yeah I'm annoyed at myself

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Can you put some of this information in an email?

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Who cares. You obviously over explain to everyone. If they think you’re doing it because they’re a woman. Explain that you’re not. And make sure to tell them not to assume your gender while your at it

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Let’s be real. Do you not consider how the intended recipient of your words might perceive (or misperceive) them?

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