I have never lived by myself, went to a restaurant/movies by myself, traveled by myself (always involved friends, family or boyfriend). Blessed or cursed?

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Cursed. It’s single-handedly the best way to learn about yourself and develop true independence.

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Being forced to navigate through this world by yourself, without any major reliance on others, instills an additional level of confidence and character in you.

Living on your own provides you with a “blank canvas” and forces you to take additional personal responsibility. You will develop a normal routine that hasn’t been influenced by others, which may end up taking you in a new direction in life. You will also face the pressure of somehow keeping the roof over your head in case something happens (layoffs, etc.)

God forbid, if your loved ones suddenly die, are you prepared to stand on your own two feet and keep the ship afloat?

God forbid, if your boyfriend cheats on you with your best friend and it somehow decimates your social circle, are you prepared for the aftermath?

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Either or. What do any of those things have to do with being blessed or cursed?

I will say that being able to enjoy your own company and be alone are pretty critical for a well functioning adult.

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Oh man!!!! You are missing out. You don't get to learn and experience how awesome you are and what you (alone) like until you spend some quality alone time. Highly recommend. Learned to take myself out when traveling a lot - best time I had. Learned it's really nice to just be.

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I went hiking in Arizona, lots of times to a beach, I even did Rome solo. It’s not bad at all.

Cursed. Learn how to enjoy your own company and how to be self reliant. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. I’ve lived alone for quite some time and haven’t been in a relationship recently and I do not feel lonely at all.

likefunny

I would say both maybe. It sounds like you have been blessed with an awesome support structure. The curse is being able to be independent and still function if your support system folds.

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26F - living on my own has been longterm survival training. I know how to do basic repairs/solve issues, optimize my living space, etc. My space is also all me, without input from other people.

As far as activities, it's great to have company, but I can't have everything I do dictated by other people. I need to be able to take detours, leave when I want, go at my own pace. Also, I meet more new people on my own. If I go somewhere with company, I'm really only spending with the people I went with.

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Definitely cursed, sorry for your loss OP

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Curious…why haven’t you done these things by yourself? I love and miss traveling by myself.

It has never come up and I personally wouldnt choose to do these things alone because it seems boring to me, but maybe I am missing something? For example, why do a solo trip when I can have more fun by bringing friends or my boyfriend along?

Neither… you made decisions that resulted in where you are today. If you want to make a decision to have some time by yourself - you can do so at any time. Start by grabbing lunch by yourself one day and see where it takes you.

Living by myself for a year in college was one of the best experiences ever. I have lived with a bf ever since and honestly if it wasn’t so expensive I would prob still live separate lol. I still enjoy doing things alone and am planning to travel alone but I listen to a lot of true crime so i haven’t been as eager for that 🤣 but I definitely support living/doing things you like to do alone. It is kind of like the best form of meditation

I've been by myself for almost the entirety of my adulthood. A very limited set of friends, almost non-existent social life and a robotic routine. But slowly, I realised I can't live like this. I can't wait for a person/people to suddenly come into my life and make everything bright and happy.
Then, I started going out, made a solo trip to mountains last year, went to few good restaurants, night clubs(was good for the first few times) and movies etc.
At first, it sucked big time. I didn't get any point of doing that, especially watching group of people out there, having laughs really ached my heart. But eventually, I've learned a lot about myself. Sure, that statement has no physical bearing but you'll be surprised once you are past that wallowing/doubting phase, that what you want in people. What traits, qualities are dealbreaker, where do you want to invest your time. Granted it is gonna take a lot effort but it surely is worth it. Because, when life goes down south, you will have tools to pick yourself up, you'll know who to open up to and also, how to help people around you when they are going through difficult times.
It requires work to be with someone and it requires work to be by yourself.
Good luck, OP!

Until now, I have realised about my self-esteem issues. There was always a sense of self-doubt which crept into almost all events of my life. Dragged myself into therapy which is going good so far.
Also learnt about whether my career choices are good for me in the long run and sure, they do suck rn but it doesn't have to for long time. Got enough courage to resign and got a new job. Loving it so far.
I'm sure, you may learn this with people too, there is no exclusivity but this is what my journey looked like and I am grateful for it.

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Nothing wrong with that at all, although some of us really enjoy time by ourselves. I once spent two days alone in the heart of Tokyo on foot with nothing by a little phrase book, in 2009. One of the most memorable couple of days in my life. Love time with family and friends too of course.

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