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I just asked the guy I’m dating (who I really like) what is body count is and I’m shocked - it’s super high....how do I not act weird now?

likefunny
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One other comment / piece of advice from a former slut - obviously based on my husband and my numbers (^ 50/100) we’re both very sexual people, which is one important factor to long-term compatibility. While I definitely don’t think numbers matter, at all, sexual compatibility does matter. If you like sex or experimentation less than your partner or vice versa, I could see that being a long-term problem. High numbers don’t necessarily equal highly sexual people, but they can be correlated. I’d focus on assessing your sexual compatibility, not your number discrepancies

likesmarthelpful

👏👏👏

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27y/o here! Mine is definitely in the higher bracket of what has been mentioned here. It’s definitely less than 100 though😂😂
My boyfriend on the other hand has had 3 partners, myself included! He wanted to know so I wrote down a list of all the guys I’ve been with and surprisingly, he adores me for my honesty. If your boyfriend loves you, do the requisite tests and live happily! Those years of experience may have made him one hell of a sexual partner and now you get to reap the rewards!👄

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I’ve been watching too many true crime shows. Took me way too long to realize “body count” meant sexual partners and not murders. Oy

likefunny

Ha! Me too, I love Forensics Files, so I was just like OMG, traveling consultants getting away with murder in other cities 🤯

likefunny

Why would you ask?! 🤦‍♀️

likefunnysmart

I hinted on asking once, and Bf told me don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to ... so I didn’t ask cause I totally would have felt the same if he gave me a high number (which I expect ...)

likefunny

My ex had a high body count. I didn’t really care as long as he got tested, is clean, and respects my boundaries. I just saw it as him enjoying and experimenting with his sexuality, whereas, I’m more conservative sexually. Nothing wrong with anyone’s lifestyle.

likeuplifting

Thank you A2! As long as he’s clean + respectful and faithful to you ..why does the count of sexual partners before you matter? I think asking the question just brings tension to the relationship because judgements are made about one another.

I’m somewhere close to 50 including both genders, I lost count. My husband is closer to 100, women only. We were both over 30 yo when we got married. Who cares though, sex is fun, just be safe. And experience isn’t a bad thing - people’s past is their past and shouldn’t bother current significant others so much! 🙆🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

likesmart

I thought we left body counts in 2019..🤦🏾‍♀️

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These seems extremely tone deaf to me right now

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Btw: thanks y’all for not making me feel like a whore anymore. 👌🏼

likefunnyhelpful

Nothing wrong w being a “whore” if you’re responsible and honest w your health status. But also can we not use that word?

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I was on his side till you said 70s.....whew. Well. I guess as long as there’s no kiddos that he isn’t taking care of and no STIs etc it’s okay! We are all different and pleasure is natural.

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Does anyone else find the term “body count” strange? Is that how people refer to sexual partners?

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Yeah I also used the term “number”. Haven’t heard “body count” much

I don’t even know my own body count.. and I was not that promiscuous when I was single. I purposely didn’t want to track the number because then you become a slave to it. My fiancée and I have never discussed it. I don’t want to know and he doesn’t want to know. I would recommend trying to forget about it and focus on all of the quality matters of your relationship as a whole

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This hasn't crossed my mind to ask any serious bfs since my first one in high school. Id rather find out about his experiences than some number with no story behind it.

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Wow as someone who has only been with 1 person, im beyond shocked 70 people holy moly

like

Did not realize casual hooking up was this common

How high is high?

likefunnyhelpful

That’s gross

Body count doesn’t equal feelings. Also don’t ask if you can’t be ok with the answer

likesmarthelpful

Ask him to watch the show Too Hot to Handle on Netflix and evaluate life choices.

likefunnyuplifting

Just found this on Instagram and thought of this post.

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I dont know. This would make me question if we think of sexual intimacy in compatible ways.

like

I dated a guy with a similar count. I broke up with him. I couldn't do it 😅

like

If you assume he’s been steadily sexually active since he started college (when he turned 18) that’s average ~one person every other month. That rate doesn’t seem SO crazy if you’re mostly single that whole time

likesmart

Yeah that’s how I thought of it too. I really don’t think it’s a big deal if everything else in the relationship is going well. Sure you should ask if he’s been tested but you should always ask that regardless of whether someone has slept with 2 people or 100 people

smart

There were some drunks involved haha

funnylike

Omg drinks*

funnylike

Ok, now I know I am old! I was thinking body count... why would you want to know how many people they have killed! 😂

likefunny

How did he find the time?!

likefunny

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