I just matched with a guy on a dating app and he asked me what my race is almost immediately. For context, I’m Indian American, light skinned and he was Indian American as well. I find that Indian men often ask me my race and when they find out I’m not half white but am fully indian they unmatch me, but no white man has ever asked me my race. It seems there’s a large group of Indian men on this app, can someone enlighten me as to WHY Indian men have such hang ups with race? TYIA

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Based on my experience, many of the indian women who I knew growing up treated me like dirt. The indian women who happen to be mixed with a white mom tended to be way nicer and kinder. Very anecdotal and I am still relatively young in that regard, 23. As an Indian male , I have actually made it a point where I try to avoid indian women just out of pure resentment. And I know I'm judging based on my history, but it has been my experience. ( Born and raised in NYC)

likehelpfulsmart

@pwc1 that's what I'm talking about, big W bro.
@ SA 1, the ones I went to school with, they were the meanest of all people to me. Maybe cause I was an easy target and kind of nerdy. The nicest women I've met have been white girls, always kind to me and never treated me badly.

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I’m also Indian and don’t care about race! It’s stupid and there’s no other word for people like that besides disgusting; what an ahole!!

On a separate note, I see you’re a VP; wanna be my sugar mama🥺🥺🥺I’ll be a good stay-at-home husband I swear😫

funnylike

VP could be real VP or a VP from a bank. Not judging but dont ever assume.

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Just ask them what caste they are. If not Brahmin then gtfo

funnylike

I’ve never met a group of people more racist towards me than my own group and it makes me so sad that my own group is racist against themselves.

likefunny

OMG Attorney2: The product of colonialism? Really?? Well I'm white and I only date black, Middle Eastern and Hispanic men. I thought it was because of my preferences. Please instead deconstruct what societal ill causes this?

How does a Vice President have so much time to reply back to every message? Referral to your company please ??

funnylikeuplifting

Everybody is a Vice President in a bank. It’s like Manager at Big 4

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I’m mixed white and black. Light eyes, lighter skin, racial ambiguous features. I got this all the time dating. Online and in person. The worst was when they’d ask and then be WAIT LET ME GUESS! Because then we’d spend 5 minutes playing pin the ethnicity - they always had these very exotic guesses. ‘Oh you are def at least a Pacific Islander! Look at your nose!

When I’d say ‘black and white’ they would seem so disappointed Bc it wasn’t exotic enough.

Many men also seemed waaaay to into the fact that i wasn’t white. Like i was some weird trophy.

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White male here in an interracial relationship and my god P1 do people actually say that to you in person on a first date or is that the crap you have to filter through on dating apps? Regardless sorry that you have to deal with those kinds of remarks.

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Reading through various threads and OPs comments, it’s clear that her responses are positive and friendly towards the ones that validate her feelings and very mean and attacking towards the ones who offer a different perspective. OP, grow the hell up and don’t bother asking for other’s opinions if you are not interested in hearing…

likesmart

Ya many American Born Desis aren’t anyway nice people to deal with. They usually put their frustrations on Indian Indians. Glad to know it was on an American Indian this time 😌

likefunny

C1 back with their ridiculous stereotypes. 🧐

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Indian male - 25 here, if any Indian hotties are looking at this thread & want a hunky Indian guy to treat u right please dm me. Thought OPs post may attract some Indian chicas 😎

funnylike

Errybody like white girls

likefunnysmart

Except they think I’m white Bec I’m racially ambiguous

OP- I’m not Indian nor white and I’m willing to be a tribute 🙋🏻‍♂️

likefunny

Interestingly enough I saw a TikTok yesterday where an Indian girl and a Black girl were shaking hands to the shared point of men of their ethnicities hating them lol

I think it may be a tad hyperbolic on the "hate" part but I can attest that a lot of men of my ethnicity (black) seem to be the same way. Super interested in racially ambiguous/"foreign" women. I'm racially unambiguous (i.e. I look straight up black) but when I straighten my hair, I often get asked if I'm half Indian or some Asian. ONLY ever get asked this when I straighten my hair. When I say no, that I'm full black, they're either visibly disappointed or try to argue that I *must* be mixed with something to have long hair.

It's odd and frankly sad that being one ethnicity is looked down upon in the dating scene now..

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Perhaps they are worried about cultural expectations? I’m African and as a quick filter I tend to swipe right on Nigerian men because a large number of them I met tend to be super patriarchal and I’m looking for an equal partner. I’m aware of the inherent bias but as a woman you get so many hits on dating apps and just need a quick filter since there’s no time to speak to everyone. If I met a Nigerian in public and not on a dating app I’d definitely be more open minded since I’m not being ‘bombarded’ so much as on the apps

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American tons of cultural barriers more so than many other nations. See coastal elites, west coasters, Pacific Northwest, heartland, Midwest, south, beltways (rust, bible, sun etc), gulf Coasters, southwest, New Englanders etc etc etc lol

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White men will be category as racist...POC will be justified as s/he wants someone from the same race, culture, etc.

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That's my point. White men won't ask your race or things like that because they will be bucked as racist. They will go out with nonwhite folks, enjoy his/her company and done... nonwhites, we have families that heavily pressure to marry someone from our race, culture, etc....if a white family will do the same, they will be blocked from every space on earth

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Remember the movie Bulworth? "Everyone needs to just keep F'ing everybody til we're all the same color." Then we can find something else to get hung up on like forehead size or ear lobes or something else equally unimportant. Sigh.

likefunny

I think Indian women have a spine compared to Indian men. The women usually don’t date outside their race/ethnicity if they think their families are against it and when they do they stand up to their families to marry outside the race, unlike most Indian guys who venture into dating women of other race/ethnicity to explore but when time comes to taking a stand they cite their mom or family to break up 😂

likefunny

The rounder the roti, the sweeter the juice 😶

likefunny

For what it’s worth (I’m not Indian) lots of people of all races have race preferences when it comes to potential partners. It doesn’t mean they’re racist.

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Maybe they could be more polite but then again at least you know sooner rather than later.

I’m an Indian guy - I have the hots for desi girls 😅

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When I use desi I mean Indian 😅

Based on your comments OP regardless of your race I wouldn’t date you. Be nicer.

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Pheeew! This is some heavy stuff right here.

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