Related Posts
My intern is sleeping in the job...
Additional Posts in Consulting
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
My intern is sleeping in the job...
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
Download the Fishbowl app to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Copy and paste embed code on your site
Send download link to your phone
OR
Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile
Chief
Find a private offer for more than 52k?
Rising Star
This… will always get more private, but could take a bit as this is a large amount for a private sale.
Rising Star
She "forced" you? Can you explain? There are some things I've got on a personal wish list and would like guidance on how to strong arm my partner.
Happy life until your financial situation cripples your relationship and leads to divorce
First step is to grow a pair
OP’s definition of love reminds me of George Carlin’s bit about gods love. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iouZYYzQEjU
Why did you have to mention that *she* forced you lol. I dont think its an important point to mention..
Hope you find an answer
That’s unique to Tesla, Mercedes unfortunately hasn’t seen appreciation like that but the depression is less
Blame the spouse, classy
Can take it off your hands. Do you accept Luna?
Rising Star
A vehicle is a depreciating asset. This is nothing new and should have been expected. You can get more from private seller but you'll still lose money. To make it more palatable to you, consider your pay per use.
Also, like KPMG said, grow a pair. Neither you nor your wife should be forcing eachother to do anything. Nor should you be passively aggressively complaining to strangers about it without speaking directly to eachother.
Try carmax they will give you a much better deal than any dealership. I just got around selling my car and the carmax offer was 4k from my initial buy price after 2 years of owning the car and 3.5k better than the closest dealership offer
See what offer carmax gives you my online offer was like 31k and after appraisal it went up to 33.5 unlike dealerships where it normally goes the other way. Also they were quick and efficient
Pro
OP, no advice on the car, but general suggestion on how you talk about your SO. Contempt is one of the four horseman that predict the end of a relationship, according to biological researcher, John Gottman, PhD. It’s actually the worst of the 4 and the #1 predictor of divorce.
If the relationship matters to you, take the responses above as a warning sign to you that you need to stop this behavior immediately. Treating someone disrespectfully, talking about them disrespectfully to others and with condescension, these things don’t end with a healthy relationship, they end the relationship.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-contempt/
https://www.gottman.com/blog/self-care-contempt/
https://www.gottman.com/blog/what-causes-contempt-in-relationships/
https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-change-your-own-contempt/
Chief
D2 great advice, thanks for the links
Carvana and Carmax have been giving really good offers, we bought a Toyota Sienna in 2021 and their offers are $5k over the cost of the car…not actually interested in selling right now but was curious! Also if you do the estimate for Kelly Blue book online it hooks you up with dealers who will offer you the price of the online estimate
+1; I have had similar experiences with CM & CV. You will have to cough up the difference to get out of the loan/lease.
Rising Star
Unless the market has changed, Carmax will likely make you a better offer than your regular dealer and the process only takes 30 minutes.
Rising Star
OP you can get an offer online that’s the same as it’ll be in person. Try caravana too, I’ve heard they give more money than Carmax for newer cars. But that was last year and Carvana might go bankrupt so idk if they still do
Pro
Update- Since this conversation. I have got offers between 55k to 61k. Waiting to get 64k and I will cut my losses. Thanks for the suggestions. I take full accountability. Love you all!!
Love this for you.
Have someone steal it for you
Should either sack up and not let your SO control you or sack up and stop blaming your SO for your own decisions.
Find another wife. Write off your current wife as loss.
I love my wife 😂
What kind of car is it (make model and year) and what state are you in? Maybe one of us can help you out… lots of places short on cars right now
D6- thanks! Carvana needs more info since it’s 2022
Chief
This brings up a good point about the modern masculine. We know some women wear the pants, but there is a need for strength, reason and accountability from both sides. So should OP have said “ok if you want that car, you have to assume the financials for it.”? Is there still the expectation that the man is the provider, in the age of splitting the check on a date, etc? I know I have encountered the princess types that just expect everything, so how do we strong men handle that? Sounds like OP was under duress, which I relate to. There is this shame move (not sure if it is intentional) where the partner implies that the guy buy this thing else he is not adequate. (It’s all subconscious signaling..) I think a lot of men suffer from not knowing how to set boundaries and stick to the budget.
What’s the proper way to say no to the SO in a situation like this?
OP explained that he bought the car out of guilt after neglecting his relationship due to the lengthy consulting hours. He has delegated his parenting responsibilities to his wife, relocated his family multiple times for his career and his wife hasn't grumbled despite having to take care of the children and make new friends with each move.
This isn't about a car. OP needs a career coach to help establish wlb, and marriage counseling as his wife is likely quietly frustrated.
First thing first divorce your wife. That behavior going to run you into poverty and depression. Take back over you life. #GetOut
Pro
IBM1, you better not be a white dude appropriating #GetOut
Rising Star
Could find someone to take over the lease/finance agreement and subsidize some of the monthly payment (ie you pay $100/month of the $1000). Have seen this work successfully for friends but YMMV.
Chief
In Canada we have a service called Lease Busters that does this. Something similar likely exists in the states?
Tbh apart from unlike times car prices tend to depreciate over time so it’s important to evaluate what year is your car and how much does it worth elsewhere. 52k isnt too bad