I RSVP'd for a wedding a couple weeks ago and it's in a little less than a month. Would rescinding my attendance confirmation overly inconvenience the bride and groom? Any chance the costs per guest are finalized at this stage? I'm feeling overwhelmed and I don't think I can make it.

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Tell them as soon as possible. This is enough time out for them to adjust with vendors. I just got married this past weekend and I had people canceling the day before - yes that was an issue.

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Generally the final count is due to the venue 1-2 weeks prior to the event (that’s when the remainder of the balance is paid) so if you tell them immediately, it’ll be fine

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You have no obligation to go if you are not up for it; however, would be nice gesture to send a card and gift/money (covers your plate just in case it does inconvenience them).

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It's past the deadline to be clear

I think you should feel free to decline. I think the catering cost doesn’t happen til a week before but even if that is not the case, when people get married and decide to have a big wedding, some sunk cost goes with the territory. If they wind up holding it against you that you that they had to pay for a steak dinner you weren’t there to eat then they are not your real friends. I’d say your health should come first and I include stress relief in that. The stress caused by negative anticipation leading up to an event can be a really terrible feeling.

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