Chief
Related Posts
Has Bitcoin made its highest highs?
Pro
Happy Saturday! Not ready to be back yet...
People at EYP Finance M&A refer?
What are your favorite desk workouts??
Additional Posts in Tech India
Pleas hit like , need 11 for DM
HCL Technologies My RM not approving time sheet in last moment and my LWD is very near and reason giving task not completed. What will happen in this situation??? Even i worked on that task but output is coming as per requirement. Do i exit successfully??? HCL Technologies Tata Consultancy IBM Infosys Wipro Capgemini
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Marriage is a fine art of daily balancing. All words and actions are done after considerable deliberation. The reaction for a word or action of today can happen even after 10 years. Immediate peace should not be taken as a sign of permanent peace.
Kindly watch tanu weds Mannu returns...the scene where Madhavan's father tells his story
If you are going for arrange marriage then go for the non working partner.
In a love marriage, anything works.
not really there is no love or arrange marriage.a marriage is a marriage :9
.
Oh bhai bhai😂
I got an arranged marriage unhappy one till i tried to understand her. Still trying to understand but once I put effort it changed drastically 🤷
Treat your spouse like a friend. don't compare them with anyone. Spoke with them to create common goals among yourself that will create a happy atmosphere .
we can do this with mature people, irrespective of gender. Otherwise what is the solution ?
Jese growth k liye job switch jaruri h 😄
vese hi mental peace k lye marriage m switch jaruri h 😌
This might become the new normal in the next few years ✌
Ctc will be what dowry 😂😂
Not every marriage is unhappy, you just have to choose the right one for you.
Many people in India still dont select their partners the right way. In our marriages status,salary,looks ,family background etc are given importance more than compatibility.which later emerges as big issues in the family as Husband and Wife want different things, they might have different values which just dont go along.
You have to be cautious while making such a huge decision of your life and not let other people pick your partner for you and you will be fine
THIS IS AN ARTICLE FROM BBC
Having a successful and enjoyable career alongside a fulfilling romantic relationship is a life goal for many of us. But even in the most gender-equal countries, finding a partnership that lasts is trickier for high-flying women than men.
In Sweden, which ranks first in the EU’s gender equality index thanks to factors like generous parental leave, subsidised daycare and flexible working arrangements, economists recently studied how promotions to top jobs affected the probability of divorce for each gender. The result: women were much more likely to pay a higher personal price for their career success.
“Promotion to a top job in politics increases the divorce rate of women but not for men, and women who become CEOs divorce faster than men who become CEOs,” summarises Johanna Rickne, a professor at Stockholm University and co-author of the research, which was published earlier this month in American Economic Journal.
The paper, which looked at the lives of heterosexual men and women working for private companies with 100 or more employees, found that married women were twice as likely to be divorced three years after their promotion to CEO level compared to their male counterparts. In the public sector, using three decades’ worth of records, women mayors and parliamentarians promoted after an election doubled their chances of splitting from their partners; 75% were still married eight years after the vote compared with 85% of those who didn’t get promoted, while there was no evidence of a similar effect for men. Female medical doctors, police officers and priests who progressed in their careers also followed the trend.
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200121-why-promoted-women-are-more-likely-to-divorce
Chief
Tc1 that's what I am saying in the main thread as well. Stop idolising men. But, at the same time, it doesn't mean everything women want now is justified and in some way right.
Also , i meant to say that women choose the best option for them , they are the selectors not men. So, obviously they would choose the best of the best for themselves.
The same thing is highlighted by the article. I think you missed that point. If women are more successful then men, they leave them for better and more successful men.
Women and men are not equal. They have their own strengths and weaknesses.
And marriage is never about equality. Its about how you work as a team.
Your husband might be earning 3-4x than you, but he loves you, Pampers you, protects you.
And in return , you take care of the family and support him. What's wrong in that.
Don't force equality where it is not required. Some things can't be equal, however hard you try.
The problem nowadays is the woke moment, where everyone is a victim somehow and want some kind of special treatment.
Marriage is a two way process, always you need skills in order to maintain it and have some spine and brains to manage the situations well,
I was in love with the same girl for past 10 years and then married her and I am a living example against people saying love marriages don't last and working wives are not suitable. I have a working wife but I am blessed to have her in my life I have been in Tricky situations multiple times relatives not being able to coupe up with each other and un necessary situations happening around but we have faith in each other have differences but at the end we stand for each other always, generalizing things and not putting efforts simply saying this and that .
I feel people have become less patient these days
Instead of talking it out normally they shout and show egos
Well I agree to some extent I am lucky to have her in my life, her upbringing is also great but it is always a two way process my family never let her feel as if she is a new comer or not one of us.
I on the other hand always try to do the best I can to support her and her family the way she does we fail, we fight but yes we talk it out and sort it always which I have learnt gradually to talk everything out and come to a conclusion and not leave it there and let it build, yes arrange marriages are now kind of getting more spookier these days and I have seen cases getting worst as people (both men and women) not ready to listen
All they want is to get themselves heard and not understand others perspective
So in general if you want to do an arrange marriage atleast wait for an year " chatt mangni Patt byaah" leads you to theses sort of issues atleast try to date and understand each other most importantly make sure that your immediate female family members get along with her I think this is one of the golden rules that worked very well for me.
Don't expect your spouse to think , agree and behave exactly like you. It is not possible. Always find a amicable solution and common ground in everything. If you are a guy, try conveying the same to your parents and avoid the in-law pressure on her. This is the main reason for troubled marriages mostly. And don't make it seem entire house, your kids and your parents are her responsibility. Share responsibility, discuss finances and respect her opinions. If you are a girl , express opinions about staying together with inlaws ,shared responsibilities, finances, job preferences before marrying itself . So there are chances you will find a guy who is more suitable with your thought process. This way it's easy when you immediately pack bags and leave to a new family new people after marriage. If your spouse understands you ,it's easy coping up with all other things around you.
The blatant sexism in these comments makes me cringe. I can only hope I never have to deal with these idiots in my career at any time.
OP, the answer to your question is simple. It all depends on your priorities. If your priority is your partner and you're willing to invest time and effort in them (and vice versa), you'll see your marriage through thick and thin irrespective of anything. That's it.
I was thinking the same. Most of these answers give the husband's version of whats wrong with their marriage(wife) :D
Subjective. No one is perfect and no one is similar. It depends on various aspects like ur partner, ur behaviour, ur wlb, etc. Someone is poor in Relationship management shouldn't fear you, as you might have successful one. So always be open for it, note it down the negatives. But those things you haven't done yet. Make sure to be always Optimistic about. Later on after experiencing, you can change ur perception. But initially always be optimistic and ready to face the other side of coin as well. All the best !
Treat your partner equal. It’s a journey and few bumps are expected but that should not deter you from enjoying it.
Even if you are happily married, ur kids may make ur life tough (In this era).
This is your story??
In today's world, the thinking of women is like they are independent , so whatever they want they can do that , even it affects the whole family.
They don't consider , if a man is doing everything to make her happy.
Man is never independent even if he earns crores per month, he cares for family and wife , but once women gets a job she becomes independent even earning 2k per month
4 different suggestions,
Married Man ( if he is happy) - Will ask you to marry without any another thought.
Married Man( if he is not happy) - Don't marry this is a trap.
Unmarried Man - to be or not to be
Divorced Man - I suffered a lot and don't want to get married again.
Final thought-
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Pro
I would suggest one to discuss their comforts, plans, preferences and expectations before marriage.
This would help you find the partner with similar mindset unless they lied to get married.
PS: People say happiness depends on both the partners equally but that's not true, if one wants to control the other then it doesn't matter what the other person do there will always be difficulties. (Unless one partner is ready to be slave)
It's Male perspective, try to get female perspective also and compare both.
Imo regardless of profession, if you're not spending quality time with your family/spouse/kids then the relationship is definitely going to be strained.
During my start of career I lost contact with a lot of my friends because I wasn't contacting them back or getting on plans with them. Instead I listened to my boss who made me fear for job security and I ended up working odd hours and he ended up taking all the credit.
So, you'll always have a job, but you'll not always have the people around you who care for you if you don't care for them
Marriage depends on how much you're ready to adjust for each other
Love / marriage is all about negotiating with each other's imperfection.
There is a line in Hindi which we phrase specially on this topic - "shaadi ka laddo jo khaye pachtaaye aur jo na khaye voh bhi pachtaaye". I hope you got your answer☺️