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Te a ching RSP/SAI. Any help on how
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Be real with them. Don't sympathise but try to understand their lives. This can should them that you are interested in their story. Also, share something about you. Sharing some likes or dislikes, things that might get you frustrated and how you handle it, or something not personal about your family. Let them know you are in it with them. Provide a safe place for them. Be patient. Earning trust can take a while especially if they never trusted before.
One thing I think is important is: appear to be human with them. I can remember teachers in school, who made it seem like they had always been these extremely positive, flawless individuals their whole lives. Be honest with them.
I do get to know you questionnaire and a personal one on one to discuss what the pot as answers. I make notes and gather additional info. I use that info to give gifts|rewards and to plan activities.
Ie last year all my boys loved fortnite. We did crossword puzzles and writing activities related to fortnite. I read and kept up with fortnite activities and was able to have genuine conversations with them.
Good luck!
Learn about their interests so you can have conversation with them about it. Yes, even the stupid video games. Kill them with kindness. Talk openly about how much you care about them and all the specific traits you appreciate about each individual. Find their sense of humor and run with it. Be willing to be silly or goofy to earn their smiles. Do all of this while having high expectations, and they’ll eventually trust you.
I have worked with students like this. I found that having structure is key. Working in TLC for seven years, I would establish certain times would be certain subjects. I learned that I would not try to do anything tp get them to earn my trust. When they find out that I am consistent, they began to trust me. I had one student post up and threaten my every day for almost 2 years. I would not back down. I earned his trust and he now says hi to me everytime he sees me in public. Don't worry, they will come around.
Ask them to write down something they want you to know about them. Promise them ahead of time you will keep what they wrote private (as long as it doesn't talk of intent to harming someone of course, find out the verbage with your admin to be safe). Or maybe something like the "Freedom Writers" movie where they could write whatever they are feeling. Or draw it. Or whatever. As long as they know that's theirs and you will never look in the journals unless they want you to. Another idea, but more long term, is to consistently show these kids that you are someone who is not going to let them down. That no matter what they may say or do, you don't hold a grudge against them. I had a kid diagnosed as ED come into my classroom to take his breaks. My classroom was where he felt valued and loved. He cried when he was sent to a different school and told me he would miss me because of how kind I was to him. Make the boundaries and expectations clear and make them known long before and wrongdoing has been done. No "surprises" where a student gets punished or in trouble for something that was never explicitly stated as something they couldn't do. Give them the freedom to have a place where they could cool off, and maybe use a secret "code" that lets you know they need a break (raising their hand a specific way for example) and allowing them to have the time to take their break to calm down. Once they feel they have some control of their lives with someone they can trust, I don't see why wouldn't get the buy in from many of them.
Pro
Put them in a circle and tell them about your childhood and ask about their lives . If the don’t want to share don’t force it. Just get them talking and share their feelings. Remind them nothing leaves this room.
Tell them about your life! I have been working a very similar classroom for a few years and only started having success when I would show them pictures of my dog,hubby and what I did over the weekend. I do family lunch on Friday where my para or I bring in snacks to go with their lunch, we pull tables together and eat and talk. Relationships in that type of classroom are huge! And create boundaries and hold them to the star dares you create, but also support them when they make mistakes. When I have to follow through with a consequence and it leads to crazy meltdowns, I or the social worker stays with them and supports throughout the whole process.