I think I reached my low. I was at a family gathering and was having fun but started taking shots. Needed help into the cab. Vomited at the venue. I don’t want to get like that again. Do I need to go completely cold turkey? Set a limit?

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You can always go lower, I promise you that. Also, I’ve done plenty of embarrassing things while drunk, so you’re in good company. It’s when the frequency increases for disasters of the “incomprehensible demoralization” variety that life gets very uncomfortable.

Plenty of people have isolated incidents of debauchery. For normal people, it’s usually a handful of incidents in college and their bachelor(ette) party. For me, it was almost every weekend. The questions are:

1. If you start drinking, do you find that you often cannot stop after have a couple?

2. Do you find yourself drinking when you said you weren’t going to or didn’t want to?

3. Have you slowly lowered your “bar” of what’s acceptable, and started to rearrange your life to accommodate drinking, vs moderating or cutting out drinking to fit the life you want?

I heard a great quote this weekend: “we hit our bottom when the consequences pile up faster than we can lower our standards...”

likehelpful

Thanks a lot for this. I feel like I haven’t lowered my bar, but I often find it hard to stop. I feel like I always make it a competition with friends and I win, which means I lose.

Maybe I’ll have to think some more about this and test it out. Like only have 2 and see if it works or if I feel compelled for more.

smart

I agree with Dir1, you can always go lower so maybe don’t use that as your criteria for whether to take action? I had a fairly “high bottom “ by objective standards, but I finally realized that drinking was taking the shine off my life. And it had been taking the shine off my life for 20+ years, which was such a shame. I’m so proud I’ve been sober for over 4 years but damn I wish it was 24.

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Coming here and wondering if you have a problem with substance means you have a problem with substance. As suggested by Director 1 try limiting to 2 and you will know that you have a problem.

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Had a similar experience recently. I’m taking a month off drinking and talking to a therapist. We’ll see where we go from there

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I'd start with trying to limit it. If it works, fantastic. If not, it's a pretty good indicator that you need to just stop all together.

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