I truly feel like some people get upset if you don’t have exclamation points or emojis in Teams/Slack messages. I just don’t see how when I don’t do that, my messages can be perceived as mean? Some people need to get a grip lol

likesmart
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Maybe you are mean?! 🤷🤣

likefunny

Gen Z really does speak a different digital dialect, and they are becoming a larger and larger share of our coworkers, in case you haven’t noticed. I don’t think it’s an objectively bad thing. Periods can be seen as aggressive or negative, ellipses especially so… all lowercase can be seen as disconnected / apathetic. Lols, exclamation points, and emojis help to convey tone more than adding any real additional meaning.

my wife’s supervisor is an older woman……. who frequently responds to her in all lowercase…… with extensive ellipses …… now that is definitely conveying a tone, even though she is surely oblivious to that.

“Proper grammar” could easily be interpreted as too formal for a casual one on one slack convo, for example, compared to an email where it is more typical to see. I’m not saying it’s necessarily a reasonable interpretation, but that’s the nature of non-verbal communication, isn’t it? To someone with autism, it seems unreasonable to expect extended eye contact just to get reassurance that you are connecting with someone.

You exist in the world only through the ways in which other people perceive you. Maybe people get to know you well enough to understand the writing style you use & the tone you intend, or maybe they don’t. 🤷‍♀️

IMO it’s just a different dialect of the same language, and an evolution of tone in the digital space.

likesmart

Lol, digital communication is so weird. Apparently using periods is seen as aggressive. Proper grammar is offensive…?

like

Are the people getting upset women? I don’t see many men using exclamation points in their messages.

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People text casually and colloquially. Like when you end your sentence with "lol" you aren't literally laughing out loud but you've given indication that you found something amusing or funny or ridiculous. That then gives some color to what you said, it also shows people what you react to.

You mentioned there's nothing wrong with using proper grammar. Are you being called out for it? Did people say it's offensive? You said you shouldn't have to change yourself for others to feel better. Did you receive feedback that you appear standoffish or too formal? You said these aren't even your reports. You mean you'd only show emotions and use emojis if they're your reports because why?

There's so much to unpack from you OP.

I'm not the gushy type who loves everything and think everything's awesome. But I also understand that's how a lot of people communicate. And I've found it easier to sprinkle text convos with exclamation marks and emojis. And mind you I'm a writer.

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Just throw in one of these and you're good :)

@OP, you don't *have to* do it. But if you're concerned how people perceive your messages, then there are ways to come off more positive, and they're not that hard to do.

It's the digital equivalent of having more welcoming body language.

Its Q4 ppl are overwhelmed & some maybe snappy. Holidays as well 🤔 so they might be looking for the feel of it as well. 🎄🤶

Communication is strange these days.

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