I was responding to a friend’s text who recently started dating someone and said “wow he’s cute! And ripped”. My boyfriend ended up seeing these texts and is now upset saying I disrespected him by commenting on other men’s attractiveness. I tried telling him that I have literally zero interest in this person but was gassing my friend up, but he still feels disrespected. I acknowledged the mess up and apologized. Any thoughts or advice on not being defensive and helping him through this feeling?

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Soo your boyfriend sounds really insecure and who cares if you comment, it’s to your friend. It’s as though his insecurity is saying you’re going to swoop in and take the new guy from your friend. It would be disrespectful if you said “wow he’s cute. I wish my boyfriend was ripped like that”

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And the thing is he IS ripped and super strong and my definition of attractiveness!! It just really bums me out that a comment so meaningless to a friend about her life is so huge to him and affects how he thinks I think 😞

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Agree with M1; stems from insecurity. My wife and I talk about other people’s bodies, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to be with each other. Ripped body is just one side; he could be the entire package. Does he fear that someone might take you away from him? 🚩

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Woof, I hate when my gf complains when I talk about all the hot girls I see out in the wild

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I really don't see how this is any different.

If I don't see the difference, chances are your SO doesn't either. That's the problem you'll have to deal with.

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One of my advice to my boyfriend “ don’t look at my closed friend’s conversation you might get hurt for no reason” . We talk crap all the time about our SO when we are angry.

funny

YTA

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There are something you shouldn't put in writing. Next time call your friend. Anything you wouldn't say in front of your bf you shouldn't put in writing.

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What if he said man your friends ass is so amazing and that body is insane. How would you feel ?

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Kind of is...

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You apologized because you hurt his feelings. That’s noble of you.

Now ask yourself if that harmless text message is first nature to you and it could happen again in other similar scenarios. If so, it’s a ticking time bomb. You needs someone you understands that side of you. And he needs to get it.
And you have to hold to those standards if he does something similar.

smart

I think he needs to relax. He needs to be more secure

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Your man is insecure. I’m sure he finds other women attractive too he just doesn’t tell you. We’re all humans and we have eyes, no harm in that.

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You can say to him that you will not do this again. You love him and his [something about hia appearance]. Just the way he is and no ripped guy would make you as happy as he does.

😂 guys hate hearing that another guy is ripped and when we get excited about other guys. Don’t go overboard though and say you don’t care about him not being ripped because that’s adding insult to injury!

Would you be ok if your bf said another girl in your circle of friends has an amazing body and gets him excited?

Woof. Insecure guys are the worst

Not his business to be in your private conversations hyping up your friend. He sounds insecure

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