Been noticing this lately as I have moved up into higher positions myself. I notice that some people have a want/need to “be the smartest person in the room.” Once I realized that quality was a distinct personality trait that certain people exhibit, it made me feel sorry for them rather than bullied by them.
You’re not “too” anything. You’re you, and this has gotten you to where you are. You can be over it if you’ve hit your limit, but view it rather as a choice you’re making (I have had enough of this lifestyle) than a choice that is being made for you (I am too emotional to be able to handle this).
My recommendation for this is to just care less. Think: this is sad for that person that they need to bully others in the workplace to feel good about themselves. Then unemotionally and factually evaluate what value you can provide.
Some people are just assholes and don’t know how to be leaders. Some people are just miserable and want others to be. Have to learn to blow stuff off. I’m dealing w this also and have a few books to read this summer... The Asshole Survival Guide, The Confidence Code, and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.
I don’t have any book recommendations but what works for me is that I try (very hard) to not take it personally. Like just imagine it just brushes over you. Also one day I decided enough was enough and called them out on it. These are my team though so they have an incentive to get along and they have been told in the past that they can be assholes. So it kinda put them on notice. Hope that helps!
I'm there with you. A fellow manager has done a job throwing me under the bus multiple times over the course of just two days. I'm starting to realize how extremely important cultural and team fit is. This particular team I'm working on seems very bullish. Not for me.
Been noticing this lately as I have moved up into higher positions myself. I notice that some people have a want/need to “be the smartest person in the room.” Once I realized that quality was a distinct personality trait that certain people exhibit, it made me feel sorry for them rather than bullied by them.
Pro
I don’t know I see a lot less of the mine is bigger with women
Also, I see high up there women get in the “weeds” and “trenches” more
You’re not “too” anything. You’re you, and this has gotten you to where you are. You can be over it if you’ve hit your limit, but view it rather as a choice you’re making (I have had enough of this lifestyle) than a choice that is being made for you (I am too emotional to be able to handle this).
My recommendation for this is to just care less. Think: this is sad for that person that they need to bully others in the workplace to feel good about themselves. Then unemotionally and factually evaluate what value you can provide.
Some people are just assholes and don’t know how to be leaders. Some people are just miserable and want others to be. Have to learn to blow stuff off. I’m dealing w this also and have a few books to read this summer... The Asshole Survival Guide, The Confidence Code, and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.
You are not alone! I ask myself this question everyday!
I don’t have any book recommendations but what works for me is that I try (very hard) to not take it personally. Like just imagine it just brushes over you. Also one day I decided enough was enough and called them out on it. These are my team though so they have an incentive to get along and they have been told in the past that they can be assholes. So it kinda put them on notice. Hope that helps!
I'm there with you. A fellow manager has done a job throwing me under the bus multiple times over the course of just two days. I'm starting to realize how extremely important cultural and team fit is. This particular team I'm working on seems very bullish. Not for me.
Pro
Yea that’s fair
I am thinking back on different grand I was on that’s true