I’m a bisexual woman but married to a man and with a kid. So I present very straight. (Contd)

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I’m debating a lot about whether to come out at work. Whenever I have previously come out, the responses have generally been very sexualised (by straight men) or horrified (by straight women who think I fancy them). So it is much easier to stay very quiet.

At the same time, bi visibility is a massive issue, and I feel like I am hiding an important part of myself. I know that role modelling is important, but I don’t see anyone else I can look to as a figurehead. I feel very alone and a bit afraid.

Are there any other bi fish out there who have come out? How did you navigate it? Especially if you have an opposite sex long term SO?

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Yes come out! It won’t be smooth sailing but visibility is such an important thing, especially for the bi community!

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Thanks all - you have given me the nudge I needed and I reached out to our local pride network lead. Apparently there are a few other women in the building in the same situation, so hopefully together we can meet & increase visibility.

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Amazing! So glad to hear we've helped ☺️

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I was dating a guy when I joined the firm, and then started dating women and came out to my team. I think it’s really great to be out if you’re comfortable with it! I also think the new generations joining the firm are pretty woke about gender/orientation etc., and would love to have more mentors and people to look up to who share those identities!

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My suggestion would be to start with the LGBT+ employee network at your company if you aren’t already active with them (assuming such a group exists in your org). While I don’t identify as Bi, I know plenty of Bi/Pan folks who have experienced what you have and finding like-minded folks within the org helped them before/as they came out to to cis/straight colleagues.

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I'm bi and albeit part of the "new generation", everyone I've told had been super accepting! Also agree that it def makes a difference to have role models in those senior positions. Definitely take your time and only do it when you feel comfortable though

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We had a bi female leader of the LGBT group at my last company. She was a great role model and I think it would be a great opportunity to step up and be out. She would bring a boyfriend to company events so was frequently asked why she was in the LGBT group at all. So I’d just be ready for that.

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