I’m a Senior Consultant with 11 years experience, an underwater mortgage, and $19k in credit card debt. If I file for divorce, will my terrible, horrible SO get half my debt?

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Finally something relatable after all those “3-years experience, 200k equity, why am I such a failure” posts

likefunnyupliftinghelpful

I don’t like credit card debt but don’t judge until you know the full story. There could’ve been unexpected health issues and bills. The horrible SO could’ve went to Bora Bora with a lover and ran up all that debt, you just don’t know

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Single af and have close to same amount of cc debt. No judgment from me, OP.
I don’t have anything to offer but good wishes for you and hope it only gets better for you from here on out!

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Anything accrued while you were together is considered joint. If you include student loans in that debt, and weren’t married while going to school, that is considered just yours.

Divorce is a bitch but so was my ex, so it was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. Well worth the financial repercussions - because after all was said and done, I worked to pay off the debt and never had to worry about what they were spending.

I’m so sorry you’re in this situation, and hope you don’t read all the comments here from people who don’t know your situation. Best thing I did was take things day by day, every situation and emotion, just one thing at a time, to avoid getting overwhelmed. Invest in your happiness - it’s worth it!

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I believe both assets and debt are divided equally. However, if your SO doesn’t have an income, you will still need to pay living

likesmart

Put some of that debt on a 6 or 12 mth interest fee card or try to get a bridge loan to pay off. The interest rates on CC debt are usually sky high. My two cents...

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I have a pretty high CC debt as well. Everyone’s situation is different. Living in NY , weddings , children and pets all add up - add to that the constant job uncertainty. If you want a well rounded life, I don’t think it’s possible to have a strong financial cushion!

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Ey2 you missed where they are underwater. So there is no equity

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Double upvote on Dave Ramsey. Also divorce is massively financially expensive. Two thirds of all people in bad marriages became happy five years later if they stuck with it (Tim Keller on the meaning of marriage is awesome). If you have not already try counseling. It'll likely be better financially and will, even if it doesn't work, give you the peace of mind that you tried absolutely everything to keep your wedding vows.

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It’s not hard to rack up credit card debt. Don’t be so quick to judge.

Even if you have a good salary, student loans and living in a high COL area can take a huge bite out of your ability to save. Plus many people need to help out their siblings and family members. If you leave college with little or anything in liquid savings, then it doesn’t take much to start adding debt.

Throw in some big ticket expenses—medical issues, needing to buy a car for a new job, losing your job—and it’s easy to start putting on some debt.

Going to your best friends wedding that you can’t afford, buying a new suit for a new job, paying for a gmat prep, and other “wants” that can can appear to be “needs” adds gas to the fire.

And of course many people pay for weddings, kids, and other serious life things too.

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My ex and I just spent over $250k in our 4 year divorce. We scrambled from every corner to get it paid. Best money I have ever spent. At this point, worry about your relationship and divorce. If there are other complex finances, hire a forensic accountant. Splitting debt is nothing in the whole grand scheme of things.

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19k in credit card debt?? Whoa

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I also had very hi cc debt (more than OP), but am finally working my way out of it now that I make decent money.

Keep pushing OP, you’ll get through it.

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Ba1. It's not about robbing from your future it's about vulnerability to job change and having the debt 100% due.

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I went to law school and passed the bar before becoming a consultant

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Wow

Ouch. How did it get to this?

I’ve been trying to reach out. Hasn’t been going well though everyone tells me I have a “good skill set”

Lol wow. Having cc debt in this field is completely ridiculous. Should be ashamed of your lifestyle

Can’t believe any of you have any cc debt whatsoever smh

Try to refinance your house and include all debts under new mortgage. Have your SO as a co-signer on new mortgage loan. In NJ all debts are split after divorce.

Single and decent consulting salary should be ok. But wife, kids, other circumstances is different story. SO with bad spending habits and a couple kids and OPs situation is easy to get in to.

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