I'm at a women's leadership event at my company, and I just heard someone say "you don't have children, what do you need to be home for? I don't understand, what can't be rescheduled if you don't have kids?" I hate this mom approach. People without kids have lives too.

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I fucking hate men and women who feel this way and I have since I was 22 and a wee little consultant who would have to work late to cover those who had to be home for after school/ bedtime stuff.

It's grossly unfair. WLB doesn't only apply if you have kids.

All you can say to people who say stuff like this is "(long pause) Wow." If you feel generous, you can add "I'm sure you don't mean to imply only parents have scheduling constraints"

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Especially disappointing to hear that at a women’s leadership event. Ugh.

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These type of women feel morally superior somehow because they have children and will often say stupid things like this. My comment would have been. Me daring! I’m my priority and maybe you should do the same your skin could use a little TLC.

likefunny

Exactly! This woman basically said she has no value in the world other than to meet the needs/want of others. Just drop everything because you're not an independent being with your own intrinsic value. Just serve others, always at their convenience, lol. And she's promoting the idea that OP should believe the same.

My plans are an opportunity, yours are not going away for 18 years.
It's easier to reschedule your parasites Ortho appointment than my concert tickets.

No, I can't cover your Saturday shift so you can watch a 6 yro play soccer, I'm drinking hard tonight and having hangover morning sex at noon.

Actual things I've said to parents.

likefunnysmart

Thats so gross.

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Ugh. This is so disappointing. I also have a family (parents, siblings, niblings) I want to see, they just didn’t come out of my body.

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The children of a sibling.

This is quite alarming rhetoric and pretty gross overall. I’d be infuriated

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I hate that!! I feel that at work as well. There’s just something there, like an underlying thing that if you have kids your time is more valuable, you are busier. And while I get that when having kids you are often on a schedule, but childfree kids have schedules too!

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At one job I was expected to work around holidays so people with children could be off.

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Same! Never again.

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Oh yes, this makes my blood boil. Another good one is when parents own being tired. Child free people can’t be tired, why would we ever be tired? Drives me mad

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This was brought up recently by some of my team members. Non parents are using pet reasons (with management laughing) and to be honest they should it is the same as they are both caring for others. Just because you don’t have kids doesn’t mean you don’t have challenges in your schedule from time to time. Parents possibly dying. Care taking could mean children or not in life.

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I have 2 dogs, and I know my husband and I would be absolutely devastated to lose them. They love us in such a pure way. You don't have that relationship with people (I won't say never, but I'd say almost never).

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that’s unfortunate.

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Just because you don’t have kids doesn’t mean you don’t have family. I often need to tend to my parents needs and appointments. They’re my priority. These people can fuck right off.

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Why do people need us to spell this out?! It's exhausting, we shouldn't need to overshare at work to "prove" who is the "most busy" and therefore more "valuable"

I hate this mindset so much. Some people without kids are caring for parents, siblings, disabled friends or relatives, or just living their lives caring for themselves. People shouldn't have to disclose their entire life structure to get people to stop doing this to child free folks.

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I’m childfree and unmarried - and I’ve often gotten people saying how they do all the things in their household (cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc). So they vent about taking care of multiple humans vs just themselves. There is no not rude retort for sorry you didn’t set boundaries in your relationship and now parent another grown adult.

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Did a man or a woman say this to you?

I take care of an elderly parent, I go on a trip every two weeks or more. I’m starting to wonder if I need to start going to drs appts with them. My other parent died last fall.

Arrggg I had a coworker in the past who was the only one with kids. She expected everyone to accomodate their schedules to fit her needs all the time. I’m usually very accomodating but after some time I noticed the pattern and told her NO. She was complaining how we do not support mothers… -.-

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