I’m early stages of pregnancy FTM and normally not sensitive or emotional (unless tired!). But I’m finding people incredibly painful and ignorant- insensitive comments about births, insensitive jokes about life being over, expectations to be designated driver (no chance), and even a bit useless with keeping the news quiet for now as requested. Pretty sure I’m not the first- any tips for handling myself and others through this sensitive time??

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Wait till you have the kid, then you have to hear the BS on how to raise it, even though you are the one who is paying to keep a roof over its head. Rise above & ignore. This is just that start I am afraid. Life isn’t over once you have kids, priorities change & life changes, for the better.

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With time you will develop a thick skin and do right by yourself and your kid. People have said ridiculous things to me and trust me when i say it only gets worse when the kid is born. Just ignore, thank for their advice or correct them if they're rude, and move on.

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My favorite was the caffeine shaming by Starbucks baristas. The one near the office would always “confirm” that I wanted decaf so I would have to specifically ask for caffeinated coffee, then get the eye. Like others have said, you just have to have a thick skin about it.

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Omg I feel like I’d be ordering double shots with full eye contact

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People feel SO entitled to crawl up in a pregnant woman’s business. Comments that minimize the excitement and trivialize the life change that is coming by being flip, belly touching, assumptions about what you know about pregnancy, YOUR pregnancy, and your body... it goes on forever.

Figure out what is just annoying, cliche or tired and what is actually worth addressing. Touching the belly? 10000% no. Questions or comments of a sexual nature related to my pregnancy? Nope. Comments about not drinking or whatever got an eye roll the first time or two, but if the same person kept at it, they got pulled aside and told to knock it off.

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Like someone above said, you will develop a thick skin!! Just remember that you’re doing something awesome and it takes a toll on your body and your mental space. Comments from other people may hit you a little harder than they normally would and that’s hard. Give yourself grace and do your best to be like a duck and let their crappy comments roll off your skin. 💕

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OH and also loud comments on me not drinking... like where can I go from there?? So sick of it already

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When I was pregnant I found it a lot harder to deal with BS. My acupuncturist said he sees this with all of his pregnant clients. Who knows if it’s hormones or the fact that we are going through a big life changing event but dealing with the standard BS from people is harder. Hang in there and know that their ignorance has ultimately nothing to do with you. Focus on you and your pregnancy and try your best to let the rest roll off.

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This is normal. The unsolicited advice will continue and accelerate when baby is born. Complete strangers will say insulting things and loved ones will be even worse under the guise of “I was just trying to help!”

Make sure your spouse is on your side. Set up boundaries and develop a thick skin. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. (Or if you were like me and a bit of a wuss, don’t be afraid to stand up for your kid. That courage will eventually translate to yourself too. I could not imagine letting others treat my daughter this way - why did I accept it for me?)

And next time (if you decide to have a second), don’t share the pregnancy news in the early stages or with those that can’t keep quiet.

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The issues with the kid are being handled appropriately - this is more about how to overcome perception at work

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