I’m not sure what bowl to put this in. I’m in my 30s, single and child free. My parents are older - my mom has always been my emergency contact. I’m having to make arrangements in case I’m killed or incapacitated. My parents are fine in the short term but now I’m wondering, what the heck do I do when they pass?? Do you get a lawyer and list them as your emergency contact? Ask a friend? What do you do? And what about care for your pets? Living wills are just for medical procedures, right?

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Do you have any close friends you could ask? Honestly, it’s smart of you to be concerned about this. You never know what can happen.

likesmart

Being single with no living parents, I've decided that I will need to have a cleaner at least once a week, so if I pop off unexpectedly, I won't end up decaying in my apartment undiscovered for years...

likefunny

Some of us thinking about dying every day because it’s the only certainty

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There's a child free bowl

likehelpful

Siblings? Cousins

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Both parents gone and I’m not close to my siblings. So the beneficiary of all my stuff goes to my best friend. My best friend is also my emergency contact.

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So the first question is: arrangements for what? Most people are making arrangements to ensure their families are taken care of, and that’s not a consideration for you. So what’s the intent of the arrangements? What do you want to make sure is taken care of and why?

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I have some assets but I’m mostly worried about pets. Bought a horse not too long ago and barn owner sent out a form asking for instructions in the event the owner (myself) dies or becomes incapacitated and that set off this line of thinking.

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My sister has been my emergency contact since we were both adults. I trust her more to notify everyone else that needs to be notified than my parents. I'm also not in the same state as anyone, I know she can travel with more ease.

If you have no siblings, then I'd ask a very close friend

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You can make a pet trust with the help of an estate planning atty if you are worried about saddling someone with the cost of a horse.

(See what I did there?😂)

funny

I think it’s really admirable that you’re already thinking about this. Our mortality is a scary thing to face as evidenced by a lot of these comments, but it’s the most responsible thing to do. You shouldn’t be shamed or made to feel dramatic or morbid for dealing with this.

If you don’t have any siblings (or don’t want them to decide your affairs) you should designate a good friend or charity to receive your assets. As for end of life medical and financial decisions, a good friend can be given DPA or you can write into a living will your wishes for DNR, life support, and type of religious services desired, if any.
As for pets, you may want to connect with a rescue in your area. I know my friend who fosters for a local rescue has taken in several pets of the deceased, and they always receive great care and home placement.

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Also for Pets, if you meet with an attorney they can setup a Pet Trust. The pet trust can directs funds to be used to take care of the pet and the wishes of the pet owner. They’ve actually become quite popular

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Take this one day at a time. You’ll be fine tomorrow. You’ll be fine the next day. If you’re not fine in three days then do something about it then

You can list me! You wouldn’t have to worry about someone bothering you. I only come into the picture when you’re dead. But then you’ll be…dead…so no worries right. DM.

Who are you close to?

Don’t overthink it. Parents, other siblings or very close friends. You need to pick the one you trust the most RIGHT NOW. If the worst were to happen tomorrow, with whom would you feel secure to take care of your animals and life decisions? That person could always be updated in the future, if needed.

Childless, not married, no parents or siblings and asset wealthy. Going to leave it all to Doctors Without Borders or MSF as they are called in France.

First, I wouldn’t worry too much about it now. Enjoy your time with your parents. If they are like most parents, they probably already have a will, medical directive power of attorney and or living will setup already. A living will is like a medical directive in which it will state how you want medical care. Some will state that if their medical health is never going to get better and just worse it’ll include a DNR (Do not Resucitate). The good part about having these setup (which are normally all done at the same time) is that the estate will avoid probate and assets in the will will pass to heirs and you have your wishes about your healthcare decisions in writing. The only other thing left would be to compliment this with life and long term care insurance and of course any estate planning if they’re estate is over the current limits .

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