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How do I get started w/CI?
Bowl Leader
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Bowl Leader
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Get rid of all alcohol in your home. Tell the people you hang out with the most that you’re not drinking (feel free to add “right now” at the end if just saying it stresses you out too much). In fact, you can pause hanging out with people you typically only drink with until you’re strong enough to say “no thanks I’m good” when you feel pressured to drink. Avoid traveling in the direction where you’d pick up a drink, especially if there’s a store or bar on your way home that you’d go to or something like that. Keep lots of soda or seltzer near by, since you’ll be craving sugar or bubbles most likely. Be generous with your food cravings, and give in whenever you want for a couple of weeks - enjoy food, sleep, etc. and do whatever you need to do to not drink alcohol. Really think about your triggers and avoid them at all costs at the beginning. These are all super beginner steps that helped me at least, and of course, some aren’t sustainable forever but good for getting going. Best of luck to you my friend, you CAN do this
Bowl Leader
Instead of “try to get sober for keeps”, why not give “one day at a time” a shot? I can do anything just for today, no matter how painful or uncomfortable or awkward.
Long term sobriety is all about just staying sober today. And then you repeat it the next day. I like AA because it gives me tools to stay sober today, and it introduces me to a fellowship of people who know exactly how I felt, am feeling, and will feel.
When you’re ready, get some of those phone numbers. And agree to go to lunch/dinner/coffee/whatever anyone from AA asks. It was important for me to see that I can have a sober life that doesn’t require me to always run and hide from alcohol. In time, the obsession to drink is lifted and I’m free to exist with normal human problems (instead of the more painful ones that drinking always caused).
I hear you and I get this approach… however I need a real perm change because I’m starting to reap the physical result of excessively drinking (and vaping weed and taking diet pills) to help me work the crazy public accounting hours. I had a stress breakdown in February that triggered constant chest pains, severe stage 2 high blood pressure x inability to sleep more than 3 hours, a stutter, pacing, migraines, inability to concentrate, etc. I need a real change in my life so I can be a living parent to my kids age 4 and 7.
Cut off all friends and family that drink every weekend, sucks but you have to. Mindfulness meditation was my key, and I found a sober community in web3(crypto, NFTs, etc.) also made a ton of money with that community. I invested all I saved from not drinking in it. The main points are cut out the negative influences and find a supportive community. Goodluck
When I think about never drinking again, it is overwhelming. Sometimes when I think about not drinking tomorrow it is overwhelming. I can however wrap my head around not drinking today.
As far as what to do early on, I got a lot out of 90 meetings in 90 days. It was important for me to talk about what was going on and to listen to the experience, strength and hope of others. I am a hopeless alcoholic, the type that is written about in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, and so i need to get really clear in my head that i am powerless over alcohol. I first got sober 20 years ago, and have relapsed more than once. Every time I relapsed it was because my ego got in the way and I convinced my self I could control my drinking and drink like a gentleman.
For me it was never 10 days or even 5, it was never more than 3. Those were bad days but what helped was each day was easier than the last. You will be massively uncomfortable so I recommend finding things to watch you can binge on.
Past the initial bad part, find a sober network to talk to either online or in person. AA is good for that, you don't have to work the program to go to a meeting; you can just be around other sober people. They will know what you're going through and will be sympathetic and helpful.
Hey fellow accountant! I quit in December after realizing I had a problem when I had a 5 day hangover, went through withdrawal, and was already damaging my liver.
The HAMS forums helped me a ton during withdrawal and so did Reddit r/stopdrinking. See link for HAMS below.
https://hams.vbulletin.net/forum/the-hams-open-forum/7119-tapering-and-withdrawal
For me, the happy hours at work are sometimes very tempting. If I feel like I’m craving and won’t be able to handle it, I choose to not go at all. Most times I’m ok and just order a coke to make it look like I’m drinking.
Busy season is tough and I had plenty of days where I wanted to drink to relieve stress. I had to replace the time I would have been drinking with other stress relievers such as walks, lifting weights, or doing something else I enjoy.
It’s been a different life for me as I’ve been sober but my anxiety is almost non-existent now, I sleep like a baby every night, have lost 5 lbs without dieting, and I overall look way healthier.
You can do it!
VP 1 correct
Enthusiast
I just went through this (I’m about 75 days in now) the first two weeks my head was screaming with noise. I journaled all that shot out and found out the real issues I had been avoiding and started seeing where I could make changes. The noise died down after 2 weeks, been going strong since then. Let me know if I can help.