I'm really good at my job, a high performer and have visibility with partners. However, I hate it. I wake up in the mornings feeling angry and resentful. I'm not able to exercise creativity as I'd like to, and feel I'd be happier in a completely different field. I'm scared to leave behind the reputation I've built. Big 4, it's safe/comfortable/addictive and Im addicted to being on cruise control. Anyone else been through the same?

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Make the change before kids. Now I’ll take my 150k year to press a few buttons and pretend I care. Can’t afford to be bold with a mortgage, kid and a pandemic.

likehelpful

This was me until yesterday - I even loved the people I worked for and with. Just hated the job to its core. And yesterday, I left in good graces to pursue something entirely new with a massive pay cut. Decided to pursue the change before having my first kid and really getting into those golden handcuffs. 🤞 wish me luck - so far it feels... SO good.

likeuplifting

Exact same boat. I fear D is cuddling me into mediocrity in addition. I signed up because client service AND excellence appeal to me. But D doesn't reward excellence. It rewards service. If you can work with that, stay. Or leave if you can't.
I'm aware of this predicament, but I can't convince myself that I'm still capable of being excellent. So I'm still here.

likehelpful

OP: I am in the same situation as you are with the exception that I no longer consider myself a high performer (maybe because the lack of care?). At one point, I enjoyed my job but the unreasonable expectations got me into a spot where I hate just about everything about my job. The only way for me to get into a high performer range again is to leverage more and push my teams harder but I know they are already over the edge and I refuse to push them more. Or, one could argue that, I cannot perform as a seasoned SM and need to get my s....t together or be gone. Regardless of the true reason, I am in the same boat as you.

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OP, I feel exactly the same way. But I do have some good days every now and then when I feel like I am validated by the extra work I do (although very rare). Recently, I started realizing this job is making me somehow bipolar, I get serious mood swings - I love this job then hate it with no middle ground. I love the security but I hate the pressure that comes with busy season. I sometimes feel I can advance far ahead but many other times I feel like I am drowning. I honestly don't know. At senior 3, I think I came too far to get out.

likeuplifting

Kniw that your job doesn't need to be your only outlet. It's ok to be on cruise at your safe job and pursue hobbies that better meet your needs with abandon. Consider this before you change careers or take a massive paycut.

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Pad your savings and try something different. Life is for the living!

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If you have a need for creativity, things only get worse if you cant express it. Maybe this means you do things on the side and dial it back at work. Maybe this means you switch careers. Maybe this means you start your own shop. Just know that you need to do something about it, and a lot of the time the braver move is the more rewarding one.

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Take a minute (or 30) to write down what you like to do - not a job, but rather skills/actions. For instance do you like teaching others, problem solving (I like puzzles and mysteries), writing stories/poems/witty Twitter responses, and the list goes on. Once you start compiling what you like to do and what gives you energy, you might notice a pattern that could lead you to your next career path.

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Best to get out early while you can. Consider a career with the federal government. While you will make less, you will have less stress, you will usually have so many different matters that you can choose which ones to work on on a given day, and they will often be of national import but without the deadlines of private practice, and thus you will have work/life balance.

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Have you considered meditation? Has helped with my auto-pilot and anxiety. Also be vocal and see where you can delegate tasks to. Hard to trust others but it’s a relief to know my bosses care about me enough to bring in help or help strategize on how to best delegate when work is hectic.

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Best thing I did was getting out of that rut and moving out of consulting. Like others said, do it before starting a family.

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I would also consider therapy, maybe prior to leaving the job. If you’re unhappy because you are fundamentally unhappy, the job change won’t help. (or if you change jobs and still unhappy, then get therapy). Have a friend who had similar issues with her job, she got therapy, got appropriate medication, and she’s been doing really well at her existing job without changing careers (again).

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Wow everybody, thank you for the responses and care. We should all start a firm together ❤️

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