I'm recently engaged, worried the salary difference is going to be an issue. I'm making $80K with a promotion coming, he makes $60K and really hard to get promoted in his industry.

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I make 3-4x what my husband makes and now he's transitioned to part-time stay at home Dad. Don't let it be an issue, and talk to him about it. Each of you bring something valuable to the relationship and it's not money. Unless you're worried about something else, then doesn't hurt to get a prenup too.

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My wife used to make 3x what I did. Now I make 3x what she does. Focus on fair proportional contributions and living in a way that you can survive on a single salary. Make sure that you both have the same amount of "fun" money budgeted so there isn't resentment. Once you get married you need to work as a team. Although some men's egos are sensitive to having a wife make more than them. I know I am but I used that as motivation. Main thing is don't ever act like your contributions are greater because you make more if you want a healthy relationship.

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I'm just going to say... I would fucking love it if my fiancée / wife-to-be was a partner at a firm. I would be like... STAY AT HOME DAD! 🙋‍♂️🙋‍♂️🙋‍♂️

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Wish my wife made 3x what I do, I would quit

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I make 80. She makes 60. No issues

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That’s not that bad, my wife will be making $200k, I’m making 88...I’ll be at $100k or so by the time she will be making that when she graduates in 2 years. I wouldn’t worry about it. As long as he is doing what he likes. Just don’t expect him to pay for more of everything, that would be sorta of a dick move.

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OP - my husband and I try to split costs fairly. So, all money made goes into one account. Then 10-15% taken out for each person to do whatever they want, no questions asked. Then use the remainder to pay for bills and savings. The understanding is that we are equal partners regardless of how much money we make, and if one of us is a SAH parent at some point, that person will still be equally contributing to the success of our family and relationship. So, try not to see it as you vs. him. See it as you two vs. the world.

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OP Chill. It’s only a 20K difference... I hardly doubt you guys are living on spam and wonder bread. Also, think about how would you feel if you were the one making 60K, not him. Would you like him to be concerned about a 20k difference in salary? Enjoy your relationship, make sure you divide and conquer the common expenses, and help your partner network to something better or encourage him to pursue additional education. These type of questions make you look petty and not ready for marriage, even if you are.

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If you make it about financials, it’s not going to last. All that should matter is your relationship. My GF makes 35 not even and I make 90s - I pay for everything because it’s not about that

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That's the issue I guess, I understand my industry and see it making more money than him. I want to be the stay at home mom.

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I make $90k now, husband makes $55k ... but he will be making $300k in 5 years. Think my consulting salary will keep pace with his pay bump? Lol

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Money issues/differences are a big reason couples split. Talk about it and get on the same page early

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Op you make 20k more now relax lol I'm sure your fiancé will get some sort of pay bump eventually

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It could be depending on him. I've have had 3-4 boyfriends where higher salary and drive were a non negotiable for them.

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@M1 - yup :). He's PGY4 out of 5, but will have 3 years of fellowship after residency. So ... I'll be the breadwinner for awhile.

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It’s not an issue if he was man enough. I make 2x my husband but we both consider the money is our equally because he doesn’t care I’m the “breadwinner”. At the end of the day we’re there for each other and support each other in our endeavors. I couldn’t live my life without him and same goes for him. As long as he’s not a lazy piece of shit and contributes to the relationship and your life, why does it matter.

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LOL @ this post

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You sound too immature to get married tbh

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@ ACN 1 - surgeon?

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Oh, and congrats OP!

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