{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "I'm so anxious and tired. I'm trying my absolute best but it seems no matter how hard I work or how many hours I put in, I'll never be good. It's a sinking and horrible feeling in my heart that all the work I've put in and my family has put in to get me here with be for nothing and that I'll be an unemployed failure.", "post_id": "60efe6dd04e6fa002449f2a9", "reply_count": 5, "vote_count": 5, "bowl_id": "5dd6e67090e5a1001c26ead1", "bowl_name": "New York Big Law" }

I'm so anxious and tired. I'm trying my absolute best but it seems no matter how hard I work or how many hours I put in, I'll never be good. It's a sinking and horrible feeling in my heart that all the work I've put in and my family has put in to get me here with be for nothing and that I'll be an unemployed failure.

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I’m a first year associate feeling the exact same way right now…trying to just take it day by day but it’s a struggle…broke down crying in front of my family the other day…first step I’m going to take is finding a therapist

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Your not alone in this! Glad that you are getting help. I might try to do the same. There's only so much one can bear by themselves.

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Hey - speaking as a lawyer who got fired 4 times from 3 jobs (two places hired me back then one fired me again), you all got this. Law school teaches you nothing about practicing law. Everyone on this board - whether they admit it or not, has been where you are. Happy to help in pm if you like. Just move forward. You will grow more from failure than success.

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How did a place that fired you hired you back? Did you apply there?

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Hang in there. You are not alone. Big Law is a great stepping stone and learning experience but can be a really tough place at times. A lot of associates feel anxious and tired. Remember to stick up for yourself if you are at/over capacity. If you can stick it out for a little bit, you may be happier at a smaller firm or in-house.

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I shop at BR and my client counterpart Shops at BR clearly. Some days we will have on the same shirt.....awkward.

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At family reunion and playing Monopoly Deal (first to $1M wins) with younger cousins. Crushed them. Teaching life lessons. 👌

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Unexpected side effect of thorough Marie Kondo-ing my closet: online shopping is no longer enjoyable. My wallet thanks me but I need a new hobby to entertain me during my coronavirus self- isolation

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