I’m starting to feel so hopeless and depressed. My job (that I’m thankful to have) keeps me busy 14+ hours a day. I’ve basically abandoned my kids and it’s lord of the flies over here. I can’t keep up. I’m tired and there is no end in sight. I don’t really know what to do.

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Deep Breathe. Stop. One More Pause. CLEAR OFF THE FRIDGE/BULLETIN BOARD New Sheriff in Town//Family Meeting Moment. I've Had Them. I've declared Them/ I NEED Help POSTER, literally. On the Bulletin Board/Fridge up Goes the new :who makes Dinner schedule/ who chore schedule/..... but you have to let go and accept A. It wont be done the way you want. B. DINNER might suck/ default is pizza C. Chores might not always be perfect but Directionally correct is good. You Need a an afternoon off.. u have to block it out, if u hear injustice...turn up the volume on the ipod. .... audiobook recommend 4 hour week, but... got to get Family on same page. Between 4 hour work week audio book (original) and resetting home expectation... a nice reboot, protect your quiet time, I hope you feel bettet... Vitamin B... u got this!!! Check in tell us how you are doing.

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That’s some great advice above. And also know you’re not alone. Yes I even have teens at home and I work 5 ft away from them and I still feel I haven’t yet bonded like I would have.

Have the kiddos Make pizza from Already made crust or just add water crust. I did this with my kiddos all the time in a pinch for cooking. Super easy and you make what you want. Even the hubby may join in as mine does.

And why is it the hubbies tend to work less hours. NM. This is probably why I bitch too much about work and the hours I work.

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I’m in the same boat. I keep telling myself I’ll ask for a temporary FWA or even take some of my 80 hours of accrued vacation. But every time I start the e-mail to take next steps, I chicken out, thinking I won’t actually be able to get the relief I need at work and will just be hurting myself in the long run. When the kids are finally able to go back to camps or school, I’m going to be an absolute shell of my former self. Totally exhausted and even their return to school doesn’t seem like it’s going to provide relief at this point.

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Are you committing to many things? Are you delegating enough? Try to prioritize and push the deadlines for what is not critical at the moment. I would also try to take time off to recharge and come back with a good game plan and do your best to stick to it! Your kids will grow and time will continue to pass, but trust me THERE WILL ALWAYS BE WORK! don’t get trapped in a hamster wheel.

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And husband is horrible with the home and kid stuff. His job is much less demanding than mine, so he gets by working 3-4 hours per day. But he’s not really doing anything to alleviate the added pressures we’re facing. Thank god for the OT shift meal I’m earning almost every day, because it’s offsetting our Door Dash bill since there’s no time for me to cook.

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Um are y’all talking to your husbands about this? Completely unacceptable in my opinion for a life partner to be acting this way.

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Whoa 14+ is not sustainable in normal times. What’s going on? If projects are that off track you need to add resources or scale back scope ASAP. Is that not an option?

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Hire consultants maybe? Not trying to be salesy but we are here to help and many firms have seen other projects get pulled back so people are sitting on the bench. I think you 3 need to raise your hands and elevate the issue to find some relief. You’ll be down to zero soon otherwise and that won’t help anyone.

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This was me last month. I asked my husband to take a day off a week from work where during that day he was responsible for our son while I do a long crazy day. Then the rest of the week days, we would do split shifts with our son. This month, I have cut back working that long a day for my mental health. I dont have pressing deadlines. I got extensions from opposing counsel on the ones that were pressing so I wouldnt be killing myself. Dont let management or a partner set unrealistic deadlines that end up with you were crazy hours. How you can address it is when getting an assignment is not asking when they need it but telling them when realistically you will get it done, “I am currently working on —— so I plan to get started on this middle or end of next week.” Also, lock the bathroom door when using the restroom or showering or bathing, tell your husband that he needs to handle any kid situations while youre in there. You need that. Read a book in there, burn a lavender and vanilla candle (or your calming scent) or listen to some music. Maybe have a glass of wine with you. Reset mentally. How old are your kids? I have a toddler so he cannot be expected to make his lunch etc. if your children are over 7, the chore chart is a great idea and include husband in it. I grew up in a house with a chore chart that included meal duties for us kids. It wasnt done perfect but I learned life skills and it helped my working mom out. Dad would only do outside stuff like mowing or taking out the trash etc.

I know..in the same boat :-(

Thanks for your support. I talked to my boss and I’m taking some time off this week. My husband is also taking my kids to my in laws for the night.

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