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I went through this for decades. I focused on myself. I took the trips, traveled where I wanted to and kissed a lot of frogs. Then I found my person, on accident in the least expected place. I wouldn't change the process if it would change the outcome.
This is encouraging! Thank you sharing.
I wasn’t even looking for someone when my husband appeared. I was even wearing a ring on my ring finger because I wanted to be single. He was a coworker at the time at my new job, and when he found out I was actually single, he insisted on taking me out on a date. We didn’t start off too great, but we worked out our issues and have now been married for 5 years.
Granted, this was over 11 years ago, so I don’t know how the dating scene is like nowadays. My advice to you is to make a list of hobbies you enjoy.. a sport, travel, movies, whatever it may be. Then join a social group that touches on those hobbies. Or a group at work for young professionals, etc. This helps narrow down to people you already have similar interests with. Then get to know them. Ask people to join you for a group outing. If there’s someone that catches your eye, go up and talk to them. Don’t wait for opportunities to come to you. YOU make your own opportunities :) If someone is single and cute, YOU ask them out. With things being virtual nowadays, put yourself out there more. Is there a Zoom call? Turn your video on. Show that great smile! Good luck!
This was a trip. I honestly wondered a couple of times if I had written this post, although there's a couple of details that made it clear it was not. Also met husband at new job, also not planning to get married (as in ever), also had a not so great (verging on disastrous) first date, and also still happily married (we are going on 17!). It was just funny to read and feel so confused.
I met my husband at the airport during a business trip. We exchanged business cards and didn't go on our first date for months. At first I wasn't sure, but after a few dates, he started to grow on me and now we've been married 16 years and have two beautiful girls. My advice is, be open to the unexpected. You never know when love will strike.
Tell me about this ! Specially dating scene in Seattle is soooo bad !!!! I am living my life but when it comes to live life .. it’s majorly toxic guys I come across or those who are not ready to commit :( I feel ya 😩
Ugh well I’ll cross Seattle off my list of places to potentially go haha
I went on dates aggressively through dating apps (I was literally on 3 diff apps at one point) with the mentality of meeting as many people as I can, knowing that I will be swimming through a sea of trash before I’ll meet my partner. My mantra was “there are only good dates and good stories” lol. I tried to see bad dates as just part of the journey and the learning process rather than a hinderance. Met my partner through Hinge and we’ve been dating for a year and a half now, making it through the pandemic/long distance and all
The apps are a necessary evil 😩
Preaching to the choir, if I have to answer another "hey" in my DMs I'm bound to adopt 12 cats and move to the mountains.
I met my husband in the office (we weren't quite coworkers, but worked for the same agency in completely different parts). We were both seeing other people very loosely... We were just not looking for a serious relationship. Things started completely wrong, lol. So wrong that we both thought it'd be good to just talk to make it just ok/not awkward in case we had to cross paths again in the work environment. We met to smooth things out. Then we met again just because. Shortly after we both stopped seeing the people we were seeing. This was almost 20 years ago. We've been now married for 17. I think the lack of expectations about a potential relationship when we got to know each other was huge in allowing us to actually just truly get to know each other in our full complexity. And starting off (as in, with disaster story) was also good because we never started with pretending to be perfect/anything actually; we knew clearly we were flawed.
This march will be 5 years with the love of my life, a concept I had totally given up on right around the time I met him. I was on dating apps, sort of just chatting with everyone rather only 'swiping right' on the hunks. He had a sappy screenname that I totally judged but he had a good pickupline too. We chatted about movies for a few days before he asked me out for coffee. Our first date lasted 5 hours, completely on accident because we get on so w3ell. I guess my advice in all of that is: if you aren't finding love, maybe you're looking in the wrong places. It'll happen, just be open and don't let yourself be jaded.
If you set high standards for a partner, maybe you should make some changes and be more open minded. I found that being more open to men I normally wouldn't be attracted to, made me more attractive to those I did want to date. Maybe karma in action? Hope that helps!
The biggest advice I can give is don’t change a thing about yourself or who you are. That will be the only way you find your *TRUE* person.