{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "in need of some advice from other women related to sex😔 I really struggle with performance anxiety in bed. I want to be confident but I have so much irrational insecurity about whether I’m good or what my partner thinks, that sometimes anxiety hits me mid-sex and I just give up, even if my partner’s super into it. I can’t even think about whether I’m enjoying it, and I feel so frustrated with myself that I get so in my head and can’t be brave. Ladies, how did u learn to own ur confidence in bed?", "post_id": "5ec4a7d0993d85002a462718", "reply_count": 15, "vote_count": 4, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting", "feed_type": "bowl" }

in need of some advice from other women related to sex😔 I really struggle with performance anxiety in bed. I want to be confident but I have so much irrational insecurity about whether I’m good or what my partner thinks, that sometimes anxiety hits me mid-sex and I just give up, even if my partner’s super into it. I can’t even think about whether I’m enjoying it, and I feel so frustrated with myself that I get so in my head and can’t be brave. Ladies, how did u learn to own ur confidence in bed?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Sometimes I pretend I’m someone else (not an actual person) but I fake my confidence until I make it. I will imagine I’m a hot, desirable person until I get really into it and I actually become that person in real life! Because you are!

like

Alcohol?

likefunny

Or ask your partner to constantly compliment you to get you into it

like

We bought magic wand (best money spent). We use it on me for like 15 minutes before P in the V. That gets me to relax and of course 💦. Then we use it again during P in the V action.

like

When I remember he’s gonna finish no matter what, I focus on getting to mine 🥳

like

Definitely a vibrator and self exploration. Getting comfortable with what you like on your own helps .

like

Part of it is just trying to relax and enjoying yourself. Knowing what you like. Trying to get out of your head. Focus more on the present than questing If they enjoy or not

Does your partner not communicate or demonstrate that they are enjoying themselves? Most people are pretty simply and open to communicating what they like or don’t like in bed

I just focus on the pleasure. Almost all of my partners have said their best experience with me was when I just enjoyed myself and didn’t overthink or worry if I was doing things well for them. They got off of me getting off and vice versa.

Getting to know yourself and what you like will give you more confidence in bed

Turn off the lights and close your eyes, maybe that’ll make you feel less self conscious :)

Music on in and low lighting helps me especially when I’m feeling self conscious about my body.

I also feel the same way as you. I tried The Finishing School by Vanessa Marin, might be worth checking out. She basically walks through in detail the points others have made above.

Her main points are to love yourself, get your head in the game, and figure out what you like. I have a hard time being in the moment and I think it will take more than her course to help with that 😂

Smoke a joint beforehand and have him give you lots of foreplay

Additional Posts in Women In Consulting

Finally reading Osterholm's book about global health and ID. Super interesting, and concrete suggestions for preparedness

like

Big law counsel (partner track) salary?

like

Had a phone screen with a door dash recruiter and just wanted to say my experience was awful. Recruiter called about 10 mins late, gave no apology. I could clearly hear the background noise and side conversations which made it hard to understand/hear. Not to be a critic, but the individual lacked serious conversational skills to the point it was very awkward. Really not interested in the role anymore. Has anyone else have a similar experience?

like

How is the work culture of ITTS-ITQS team at EY GDS?

Does Referral process lead to shortlist ? Or should I consider applying via LinkedIn? TIA

like

Do you know if PwC reimburse for wfh equipment such as a desk chair or a mouse? PwC

like

Y’all ever just have one of those days where you just can’t get productive until around lunch? Today is one of those days

like
like

Like every other creative industry burn out, I'm starting The Artist's Way in January. Has anyone else done this?

like

Hello! Does anybody have some hiking favs or tips in the Great Smoky Mountains? It’ll be our first time hiking in the South.

like

Hi Fishes,

I have got offers from Maersk and Shell with the same payscale, bit confused amongst which one to choose. Seeking your valuable feedback

like

How much do SAP principals make with about 8 yoe

like

I know this is restrictive but I’d like to end up in DC and ideally in a PE / VC investment role.

Already given this is a small-subset of opps, what places have people heard of besides Carlyle and extremely niche shops?

like

Hello experts,
What do you think how long will this wfh continue??

I am based out of rajasthan, small town and currently work with infosys for past 8 years, am sure even if infy calls back to office, i can ask for wfh permanent or at my wish. i cant leave my hometown,as my wife is in rajasthan gov.

Now i have an offer from mphasis, atos, with 100% hike. Initially wfh remotely but later on if office opens, will have to move to bangalore.

What do you think how long will this wfh continue ????

like

Does JP Morgan email the initial offer after final interview or does the recruiter call?

like

Can anyone let me know the benefits at Accenture?

Accepted an offer but the recruiter disappeared before sending me the list of benefits he promised to send, so was curious to see what those are at the moment!

The offer only lists that benefits are changeable, and you receive current ones so they aren't clearly defined)

like

BDO folks- are you working remotely or in person in the San Francisco office?

like

Just got a quote for a $24 per square foot for materials on a wood deck. Before labor I’d be around $4800 for a 200 sq door space. Does that sound right?

like

What’s the general annual hike percentage in Infosys Consulting? Is it similar to Infosys Limited?

like

Additional Posts (overall)

Just a friendly reminder.

Post Photo
likeupliftingsmart

Looking for a crossbody wallet/wallet on a chain. Any brands that have cute ones? Ideally brown leather

like

Ladies, any recommendations for nail stickers? Want to start taking better care of my nails, and feel like this would be a good place to start

like

Couldn’t even finish watching the presidents speech. Lol so America looked at this man and gave him a whopping 70million votes? A man who lies through his nose!! Sighhhhh

like

Any skin care routine that works on the road that you could share ? I have oily skin now and it sucks!

like

Any lady 🐠 join their work Fantasy league? I really just joined it to be able to “connect” with the men in my office

like

Started laser treatment full bikini and underarms. Had my first session two weekends ago, hair has grown back as thick as before and it’s not all falling off yet. Is this normal? Or should all the hair fall off from the first session?

like

Has you ever broken up with someone that you thought was “The One”. Went through a really devastating break up recently (3+ years together) we both love each other dearly but it just wasn’t working

like

Have you ever used a male massage therapist? How was the experience? Trying to book a session and only a male therapist is available but I haven’t used one before.

like

I’m doing 10% roth and 3% traditional 401k out of my paycheck now. In addition, I also have a roth ira. Should I adjust the % I’m contributing? Maybe do more traditional, etc.? Appreciate all inputs!

like

Bored in quarantine? Enjoy fantasy novels? I’m looking for some kickass women to beta read my current novel sometime in late Dec-Feb to provide feedback. And I trust consultant feedback.

If you’re interested, let me know and I’ll DM 📚

like

For the ladies who slept with their long time SO after the first few dates...how did you allow the sex to not get in the way of building a relationship and all that?

like

Anyone has bought a dermaflash or something similar. I didnt realize how much face hair I have until now. Wondering if I should just go to a professional for dermaplaning or do it myself.

like

Hi ladies! I’m starting to get bad forehead wrinkles and need recommendations for products to prevent them from getting worse! Plz help! Btw 25 yo for reference.

like

Anyone here’s SO doing a medical or dental residency that involves weekend work/being on call? Looking for tips on how to make it work with opposite schedules.

like

Any advice for managing stress when projects spin out of control? I’m taking things really personally even though I’ve done everything under my control.

like

Any ladies with moderate to severe acne tried IPL, Fraxel, or Pixel? How much did it cost? How long did it take your skin to heal? What was your result after one treatment?

like

Anyone else resenting that time of the month even more than usual... 👿👿👿

like

What shows are you watching today? Need some options 😎

like

I’m an asian woman and I’ve struggled with my appearance. Yesterday, I asked my boyfriend what other people would rank me as and he said perhaps and 8 or 9/10 but he said I see you as an 11/10 but you shouldn’t be asking these types of questions. I got really sad that I’m not perfect and I just broke yesterday. I know ranking is very middle school. Ive asked my boyfriend too many times for validation idk what to do I just feel ugly asf. A lot of times I wish I weren’t an asian woman:(

likesmart

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Download Fishbowl to see what others are saying
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the Fishbowl app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Already have an account? Log in

New to Fishbowl?

image with Fishbowl logo and arms reaching out for a handshake

Already have an account? Log in

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.
Messaging rates may apply

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal