{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Is anyone following this post about men not wanting to coach women because they’re afraid of false accusations? I’m very disheartened because I already face gender bias in a very competitive cont.", "post_id": "5ce4cb38f4b0dd001bef30fb", "reply_count": 13, "vote_count": 10, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

Is anyone following this post about men not wanting to coach women because they’re afraid of false accusations? I’m very disheartened because I already face gender bias in a very competitive cont.

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I’ve read some of it. It is really annoying. Honestly it seems like a bunch of men whining and using it as an excuse to avoid something they already didn’t want to do (ie treat women as equals in the workplace). So now they are being passive aggressive about it “Oh if you want to make a big deal out of this metoo stuff, I’ll be forced to discriminate against you for the good of the wellbeing of my family” Not saying there is never a false accusation, but to hear these guys tell it is SO risky they just can’t take the chance. I hope they also don’t fly on planes or drive cars, given that they could be killed in an accident. Maybe I’m just grouchy, but seriously 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕 to all those guys. The good news is that I haven’t personally noticed any impact in my relationships with men in the workplace. My husband is a senior parter in a professional services firm and works with junior women all the time, and he has never expressed concern about this affecting his behavior. So I wonder if this is just anonymous FB complainers who aren’t representative.

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I hope so. I was pretty overwhelmed by such numerous and negative response, so hope they’re all outliers.

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We have to find our mentors, and honestly, you don’t want to be mentored who thinks this way. I promise you, men who think this are not going to be the mentor you want and need. Seek out professional groups for women in your field, build a peer group, and start mentoring down as soon as you can. we have to build our own spaces, we have to take up space not ask them to please let us into theirs.

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Have you thought about what we do as women which is similar to what they’re doing? I for example do not meet one on one with guys from work to be safe unless it is in a very public environment and they’ve shown me I can trust them. So I’m sympathetic to their responses because I think both sides are cautious.

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So my ex counselor whom I love and is a pped was telling me a lot of his peers feel that way. While it’s frustrating for us as women, I feel like I need to try to understand and empathize with their point of view too. This guy has mentored more women than men his entire career, and if he’s having doubts now, we can’t ignore them or shrug them off as “those men are jerks”.

Yes!!! This!!! 👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻 Men are using this #metoo paranoia to justify their disinterest in helping women achieve. (Because, really, why should they be interested in helping to topple the patriarchy that serves them so well?) In my experience, the men who are true advocates are not at all concerned about their intentions bring misconstrued.

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Maybe this 60% have good reasons to be afraid

60% have “good reason to be afraid” of a false accusation? Or being caught being creeps? In either case it seems like a very inflated number...

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