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I miss grad school parties and galas :(
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I’ve been dating someone who is generally more negative than I am for almost 2 years now, and we’ve been close friends for 12. If everything else clicks and you can tune out the negativity, it’s not bad.
Also, idk ab your partner’s mental situation but I have greatly benefited from cognitive behavioral therapy. It helps you train your brain to reframe. I’ve found myself able to not think as negatively + not be as heavily impacted by negativity from others.
Chief
I’m an extremely upbeat and optimistic person. My husband is definitely more pragmatic, but he will have bouts where he is pessimistic. At some point, after I’ve listened and been an empathetic partner, I usually tell him he can continue to be a downer by himself or he can cheer up and have fun on a date with me. I’m cool either way, but I cannot hang out with needless negativity. Luckily, he snaps out of it pretty quickly.
One of my best friend’s husbands is constantly negative, and with my relentless optimism, we would definitely never be compatible, and that’s okay. It just depends on what differences you can accept in your relationship.
Rising Star
This is good to hear. I’ll try this.
Pro
Yeah but it might get annoying fast
Rising Star
Yup I married one and can confirm he’s annoying AF lol
Pro
Most people that are considered pessimists are actually pragmatists. It's an easy misclassification, though where a pessimist doesn't believe in optimism, a pragmatist simply doesn't find value in it.
Pro
No, because that's just reality so it doesn't require any emotion in either direction.
Rising Star
Someone who’s eternally negative can be draining to deal with. A close friend is like this and it’s not realism in any way. They wallow in the thought of things going badly and when things turn out fine they just move on to the next thing to be negative about. I’m not an optimist by any means but that pattern of thinking gets to me, and it’s affected their SO as well.
Rising Star
I have started talking about it. I’ve discovered I’m not very tactful about it though and it generally starts an argument. I am working on a new strategy to carefully approach the subject with her.
Pro
Date who you want; it is your life. There is no need to seek the approval of strangers.
Pro
Yes I too deserve love
Rising Star
They'd probably say it will only end badly
It can really effect your mental health - be aware of that. It can change your mindset negative if you’re in a constant negative environment
That’s not fair on you. They should be going to
Therapy if they can’t view anything in a positive way
Rising Star
How much? It always depends on the scale and kind/type
Chief
Your pessimism: It can’t get any worse!
Their optimism: Oh, yes, it can!
*Mileage may vary with your patience level with the person.
Ok for who lol? Ok in what way?
Obviously you CAN. The question is how does this impact you personally. What are you concerns?
Rising Star
I could not do it personally, you’re life becomes what you put out there
I'm an optimist married to a pessimist. We balance each other out.
Run away, these people will drain you and should only be dating each other
Is it okay to date someone who is an optimist?
Pro
Yeah but it might get annoying fast lol
Pro
I’m a realist
Chief
Nah, you can do better.