It’s Friday so let’s laugh. What’s the craziest thing you heard in zoom from a student?

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During my 3rd grade Lunch Bunch zoom (yep - still virtual)...

Student 1: What toys do you play with?
Student 2: I don’t play with toys anymore.
Student 1: What?!?! How do you not play with toys?!?!
Student 2: I’m 9 and 1/2. I’m too mature for toys.

Judging from the massive show and tell of toys that followed, she is my only student too mature for toys. And no, her lack of toys is not because of her home situation in any way - her 2 yr old brother has bunches that he regularly throws at her when she’s on camera. She really feels she is too old for toys. She’s obviously more mature than I am - lol - Legos are awesome!

likefunny

After Mother’s Day weekend:

No one:
Student: My mom was drinking something bad with her friends and fell asleep.

Or

Reading a story about a fire station.

Me: Does anyone know what the pole in a fire station is for?
1st grader: Dancing!

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Me: Are you in a car?
Student: Yeah. My sister has a dentist appointment.
Me: I appreciate your dedication.

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I was covering a class for a friend/colleague (not my subject matter) who had a dental appointment. We were reading and discussing a novel that has some video connections. It's very suspenseful. In the video, a girl goes to investigate something, and there are creepy sounds and images in the window. A boy shouts, "Are you crazy?! No, no, no! Get out of there!" I was cracking up!

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We were reading and discussing the origin of the Olympics in Ancient Greece, a young man yells out, “I just noticed, I have a really big head”. It was just too hard to not laugh out loud, he laughed too. 🤣🤣

likefunny

I host a pj Storytime once a month and this past month I read Stella Brings the Family for Mother’s Day. One of my favorite Pre-K kids piped up, asking how two boys could have a baby, “because my sister says that one of the Dads would have to cut their thing off for them to have a baby”.

I quickly reassured the group that no, it wasn’t necessary for anyone to lose any body parts, mentioned that a lot of times in two Dad families the kids are adopted, amd then we moved on to Super Sloth... 🦥😂🥰

likefunny

Not pandemic specific but... no. I have had at least 2 dozen current students or recently graduated (within the past two years) students die in my career. Two different districts.
Rarely counseling for the kids. Never for the teachers.
Started avoiding the news to cope.

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I think you put this in the wrong spot.

likesmarthelpful

"What's he got on his head?" I was wearing a bandana to control my wild hair.

likefunny

Just recalled this one. When we were completely virtual, when it wasn't quite time for class, I had a student start making weird sounds and calling out for me. I was across the room and couldn't get to the computer quickly. She had gotten a piece of floss stuck in her teeth. Not sure what I was supposed to do about it! (I empathized, of course.) It was hard not to laugh, though.

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