I’ve been feeling very very inadequate lately. Don’t know if it’s the wine talking, but I’m starting to think that I’m not as competent as my peers and that maybe I should quit altogether or take a dock in class year. Idk just wanted to vent, been feeling like everything I do is a mistake and that everyday is a fight against my insecurities

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Replying to say you’re not alone. The hardest part about this job is the insecurities for me and I am aware of how ridiculous that is. I know easier said than done but let’s stay strong - let’s milk this career and collect as many paychecks as we can!

likeuplifting

Thank you kind soul! Some days it’s hard to be positive but comments like this makes it better

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This is very common among associates, they may just not be talking about it openly. Please don’t be so hard on yourself. The fact that you care about it so much shows that you are already a good associate. Most things get dumped on associates without any guidance and everyone is too busy to provide training. That doesn’t mean you should or you should be expected to know everything and feel really competent all the time. I can assure you most associates go through times where they feel like this and it will get better. In the meantime it helps to try to be kinder to yourself.

likeuplifting

Everyone feels this way at some point. Remind yourself that you have accomplished a great deal and the firm is invested in your long term development, whether it’s internal or external and you choose to leave. They wouldn’t have hired you if you couldn’t do it and the job is not going to be easy.

Mistakes happen and that’s how you learn. It is called practice after all. However, I strongly advise against viewing your job the way A1 says and trying to milk it for paychecks. If you have such a short term view of just trying to avoid getting fired, you undoubtedly will be less effective and less happy. Instead, I try to think about how I will be successful as a person and as a lawyer over the long term, recognizing that while I am fortunate to be very happy at my firm, life happens and you might need to pivot. Keep your chin up, you have made it through 100% of your shitty days and still can come out swinging!

likeuplifting

LEA - a lot of lawyers, your colleagues included, and a lot of ppl in general might not care about “success”, being “effective” and don’t put as much value into working or tie their self worth to resumes but still need $$ so suck it up with a job that otherwise might not be the right fit - and thats more than OK and i think thats what OP needs to hear. My advice to you is dont look down on people for having different priorities and finding meaning elsewhere, and dont take your job so seriously ☺️

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I am feeling this way right now. You are definitely not alone!

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Another perspective— every now and then turn off your own internal monitor and take a hard look at your reviews. Ask if they match. Your official review is realistically more relevant for your career path/decisions. Also probe trusted seniors. They’ll be happy to say things to you. Nobody’s perfect, maybe you’re being too hard on yourself.

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