I’ve had issues since high school, but just formally got diagnosed with ADHD. I’ve always managed to get by okay at work (I’m no super star), but remote meetings have been really difficult for me and I now feel like I’m barely hanging on. Trying meds now, but no benefits yet. Pros and Cons of disclosing the diagnosis to my team, partner, or firm? I’m torn.

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I haven’t shared mine with anyone at work except one person. I haven’t shared mine with my family. I was also diagnosed as an adult. I came from the generation when people were just starting to get diagnosed on the regular and so I still feel a bit of shame around it. I’m also a woman so even more so since we tend to go undiagnosed for years since we don’t present adhd in the same way as men. I’m sometimes in denial about the whole thing but the meds make a difference. Most of the time when I’m not on them people just think I’m “down” that day like I’m sad or something when really I’m just struggling. I went under the radar for years because I was high functioning and high achieving so I didn’t have the usual story of “failing” at things. I actually got diagnosed when I went in thinking I was dealing with either anxiety or depression.

I personally don’t like making excuses and struggle with the idea of being stigmatized by letting people know my diagnosis so I don’t see the value in sharing. Maybe this is the wrong approach but it’s mine and it’s how I’ve dealt with it. I think it’s because I don’t feel like I want it to define me. It’s just a thing I have to deal with and manage. Much like many other people have their battles they need to fight every day.

Good luck on your journey. And remember that meds are just one tool in your toolkit. Diet, therapy, and exercise are critical to managing adhd as well.

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I will add one thing on how I indirectly communicate the accommodations I need for adhd. When I kick off all my projects (since I’m the leader) I establish some norms that make it okay for people to share when they are having an off day because we all have them. That makes it easier for me to communicate with my team when I’m not 100% that day. Additionally I put some boundaries around hours I’m the least productive and what I need to recharge and be most effective.

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