Just curious. What actually gets you fired?

likefunny
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Getting special permission to travel to a training outside of your market and then hanging out with your friends who live there instead of actually showing up to class.

likefunny

Sounds like you’re speaking from experience 😂

likefunny

Idk, but doing whatever I want, working from home when I want, coming and going as I please doesn’t.

likehelpfulfunnysmart

Also. I got caught signing availability log and not showing up to work the whole summer. Did not get fired just a stern meeting with HR. I think if you are a high performer this is not enough to get you fired. Such a stupid rule anyway to sit in the office and do nothing.

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Transferring to a new office to serve a strategic new client and as part of moving expenses charging $20k in furniture to the client.

likefunny

Being on secret probation as a manager (married) for trying to date 1st years then getting in drunken brawl with your senior after a team happy hour in the parking deck at the office.

likefunny

Why the secret?

Falling asleep at a client. Watching porn at a client. Watching anime that turns into porn when the client walks into the room.

likefunnyupliftingsmart

At least they went out with a bang!

likefunny

Flying home from travel every week, picking up your wife and taking her to high end steakhouse dinner every Friday, in excess of $200 and charging it to the client. Same engagement team, team members were expensing cash tips to house keeping each day, about 15% of the rack rate of the room

likefunny

Using dinner money to buy bottles of liquor. Using the barely legal intern to buy bottles of liquor. Asking an associate if she's a lesbian because she won't sleep with you.

likefunny

Telling your Director you've been onsite at the client everyday but you actually haven't shown your face there in 3 months.

likefunny

All of the above. Also, asking your team to produce false documents. That one will definitely get you fired.

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Being on a project for 4 months and literally only having a 1-sentence "report" to deliver to the client at the end of the entire engagement so the Director himself has to personally grovel to the client and pulls multiple all-nighters to make up 4 months' worth of loss time and write-offs... and has to explain how a MANAGER could possibly mess it up so bad

likefunnyuplifting

Charging two different clients for every one hour of work. Refusing to learn from your goddamn review notes- YOU may think you're doing everything right, but when it is consistently documented, just fucking do what you're asked? Getting high on the roof of the hotel, then getting locked onto the roof of the hotel, then getting caught with ecstasy and cocaine on the roof of the hotel when you finally get found by your partner. Hooking up with the partner's wife. Bringing your dog into the office over the weekend and have her "accidently" piss in a partner's office. Telling a client that you being there is a "goddamn waste of fucking time."

likefunny

Hooking up with the partners wife? Honestly I would file a lawsuit for a termination because I handled what the partner couldn’t.

likefunnyhelpful

Charging time to a client when you’re actually studying and not doing the work.

Being a miserable human who’s toxic and terrible at the job so much so that all the managers in your office go to the RMP and request they be immediately terminated

likefunny

Sorry, we've fired a lot of people at GT lately.

likefunny

...did you not see the above?

likefunny

Directly asking the CFO of a top client for doc requests when you could have gone to the senior or even the manager on your project team

likefunny

Shifting work to Bangalore and low utilization. Greedy partners...

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Leaving your weed pen at your loan staff client who drug tests. Leaving cocaine at your desk. Massaging your senior manager's shoulders whenever you talk to him.

likefunny

Not showing up to work for a week

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Audit: Impatient senior not being happy with ur work and then convincing the managers and partners to get you fired.

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Refusing to be loan staffed halfway across the goddamn country for six months in a shady ass hotel while they don't let you fly home like they're supposed tom

likefunny

Screwing your manager for seven months but not reporting it until after roundtables so you can get that exceeds bonus.

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