{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Kind of a controversial/personal question. Is it that big of a deal to choose not to breastfeed your children? For no other reason than just not wanting to?", "post_id": "60fcc0c7fad72e002a8f2348", "reply_count": 39, "vote_count": 3, "bowl_id": "58f7fc5fae9f610010f862d9", "bowl_name": "Women in Accounting" }

Kind of a controversial/personal question. Is it that big of a deal to choose not to breastfeed your children? For no other reason than just not wanting to?

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There are definitely pros and cons to each and I’m grateful that we have the option to choose give our unique circumstances. I’m currently breastfeeding and it has been absolutely exhausting on my mind and body. It did get easier once my supply regulated. However, I will say that I don’t think formula would have worked out for us given how sensitive my baby’s digestive system is. It would have been an equally exhausting journey. With that said, I completely understand formula feeding and it’s benefits. It tells you exactly how much your baby is eating, allows your partner to be more involved, and just gives you more freedom overall (if I leave my house for more than 3h, I have to bring my pump, cooler, ice packs so my boobs don’t explode). For many women, formula is the only option due to latching and other issues. I think it’s amazing that we are able to feed our babies one way or another!

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I breastfed/breastfeeding both my boys. I’m a big advocate for doing what’s best for you, but yes breast milk is nutritionally better for us than formula. However, formula quality has come a very long way in the last 30 years nutritionally and is very close to BM nowadays. I was adopted and was formula fed and I have to say that anecdotally, all the other adoptees I know born in the 70s-80s have more health issues (diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, etc.) as adults than our peers the same age. BF isn’t obviously the only factor here, but just interesting to me that my brothers born biologically were BF and grew up in the same household as me and have none of the same health issues I have.

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Not genes, I met birth family and they have no significant health issues. Also, I’m not overweight, but thanks for making that assumption? It’s purely environmental. The reality is that breast milk is the perfect food and formula is a good alternative, but not as good as breast milk. This seems to trigger many moms, but it is a fact as supported by the WHO and AAP. Lots of reasons to not breastfeed and fed is best versus not eating, but the reality is that BM is nutritionally better than formula still.

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I’d recommend reading Emily Oster’s crib sheet. She sums up the data around breastfeeding. In short, there are sooooo many factors that go into parenting children that, while breastfeeding is nutritionally ideal, it ultimately is one of many factors going into how your children grow and develop. To your specific question, no, it’s not that big of a deal (in my opinion/choice/feeling). I’m sure there will be some that completely disagree. A loved child is a loved child no matter how they are fed.

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No it’s not that big of deal, I can think of a million more things that are actually detrimental to an infant’s quality of life. If people bug you about it, just make up a reason that you “couldn’t”. Like latching issues or supply. My mom was working night shifts and going to school and couldn’t nurse me at all. I never get sick, a bad cold every few years was the extent of my illnesses growing up. I know the research says nursing is better, but it’s not as big of a factor as people think. It’s not going to create a magical immune system or undo bad eating habits.

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Lol my mother didn’t breastfeed me and I turned out fine.

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Why is that when someone posts a question about others opinion, then when people give opinions, people are like women should do whatever they want without shame. Like obviously they can, but OP asked for opinions??

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LOL yuppppp

I think people should try. But no not really a big deal. But I think it’s awesome helping out with weight loss

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Honest question, I do not have kids, but..why *not* do it? Especially if you’ll have to be pumping all the time anyways, why not just throw the kid on instead of the pump?

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Glad to educate you! Women don’t really talk about it so don’t blame you for not knowing

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I breastfed all 4 of my kids but it is a choice every woman makes for themselves for whatever reason (or even no reason at all) they want. Formula is a great option and there are benefits to bottle feeding. To each it’s own. No judgment here.

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I tried for like a week and it just wasn’t working so well and turned to formula. I could have tried longer but after the switch I was happier, not exhausted and less stressed and as a result I think baby was happier, and definitely fuller. It worked out really well for us. 6 years later, a very healthy, and intelligent little boy. I didn’t even attempt to with our other babies after him, with no regrets. I never felt judged. Just do you, mama!

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Nope! I’ve nursed all three of my kids and there is zero judgement. Do what you want

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My mom thought formula was better than breast milk when my siblings and I were born 86-93. We are all in good health, happy, & successful in our professional careers. I know breast milk is ideal but not having it is not the end of the world. Also, if people give you a hard time, they need to stop. Most people will likely assume you were unable. So don't worry about it. Many women breastfeed only during maternity leave and then a short amount of time once working again. It is hard. Parenting is hard. Don't beat yourself up if you decide not to do it or are unable to.

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Not a big deal. Fed is best. If no specific reason not to, I recommend moms try though! If it's absolutely terrible or a month or two in you're still not OK with it, then you know you tried and that's that. Formula isn't easy either, between washing bottles, figuring out which to buy, cost, and sometimes dealing with baby indigestion (I know someone who went through over 8 types and ended up exclusively buying a very expensive brand as it was the only one their baby could deal with)

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I have 3 kids. Did not want to breastfeed and I did not. Personal choice. Did not want to be tied down to it and wanted my husband and others to be able to help with feedings. Every mama should do what's best for her!

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I wish I would have asked this question before I started my breastfeeding journey and beat myself up when it just was NOT working for me or my baby. Major mom guilt because everything online says how much better it is and basically makes you feel like crap if you don't do it/quit early on. Now I realize, my son cares more about being fed than where his food comes from.

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I breastfed my five kids. And I am here to tell you that if formula feeding will make you happier, it will make your baby happier. Reduce your anxiety by not caring about what anyone else thinks.

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Your choice. Nobody’s business, and if someone questions it, tell them to fuc$ off.

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I don’t have kids (yet or ever tbd) and the thought of breastfeeding is incredibly icky to me. Like I know it has benefits but it also sounds like a complete nightmare from some of my girlfriends. I’m at the point in life where I should probably freeze some eggs (I’m an old senior!) and like I can’t wrap my head around this piece. You do you booboo.

No, it is not a big deal. I’ve always said that if you lined up a bunch a kids (or adults for that matter) at any age you would never be able to successfully guess who has or has not been breastfed.

I think women should try but if it’s not working out mentally or physically then not a big deal. I was formula fed and turned out great :) I don’t personally understand why someone wouldn’t try unless you have zero maternity leave and then I get it.

Hey OP - it’s not all or nothing. You could decide to breastfeed just while on maternity leave and then switch to formula only. You can also do both breast milk and formula from Day 1. If you don’t like having a baby on the boob, you could pump one bottle a day. If you don’t like pumping, you could nurse when home and do formula when you are at work. Lots of options!

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