Single Consultants

Know this is single consultants bowl but need relationship advice - my SO was fired from their job 6 months ago (I can first hand say the manager was a terrible person and has a history of doing...

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You’ve come to the right place to get advice on #2: leave. You can’t fix other people. It is honorable that you’ve tried to stick it out and help but at some point you you should just be honest with yourself. Tell your SO to join FB and we can give her advice on 1.

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likefunny
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Look at P1 automatically assumes SO is a female. Why because they can't find a job, can't get theirselves together, or they found shopping?

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Type faster OP

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likefunny
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Faster!

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... such things). Early on it was obviously very hard for them and we were newly in a relationship. I supported them emotionally and kinda financially (took over paying for all dates and groceries). They interviewed for new jobs last year - only to get rejected after final rounds or get lowball offers (didn’t end up accepting). Now they are at a point where we’ve analyzed what they need to change (develop data analysis skills) but they are just not motivated at all. They’ve found shopping (among other things) as their outlet (others include obsessing over tv shows and movies). This has caused a lot of stress in the relationship because I don’t like where this is going (has made me more unproductive in my life) and they don’t seem to understand the longer they are unemployed the harder it will be for them to land a new opportunity. advice needed on: 1. How can I motivate them? 2. If they’ve lost hope, how bad is it that I want to leave this relationship?

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You’ve already tried to motivate them for 6 months, and have gone above and beyond in paying for groceries, etc. They should NOT be your financial and emotional burden. That’s not someone who’s trying to be the partner in life you deserve. At this point, you’re becoming an enabler of the unproductive behavior. Time to say goodbye Today and never look back! It’s the smart thing for both you and them. 💪🏼

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likehelpful
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Breaking up with somebody because they have given up on pushing forward is 100% valid. I wouldn't recommend leaving now. But I would sincerely have the tough conversation of letting them know you expect your SO yo carry their way. If they refuse or dont listen, then move on.

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After I have had a discussion with them and I am convinced they simply aren't going to put in the effort. But for me that would be part of a wider thought process. Work/job is not as relevant to me, as other aspects of a relationship.

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