Ladies, I chickened out. Did all my research, did fantastic this year, was confident to ask for a certain pay raise. Still managed to freak out last minute and ask for something lower. I should feel proud I asked in the end, but honestly? I feel like an idiot.

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Yes be proud! I find this difficult as well and have done the same. It takes practice to be more confident with it and you took a step in the right direction

likehelpful

First of all, did you get your raise? Even though it was lower than you asked, it’s awesome you made the request. Secondly, if this is your first time asking for a raise - be proud of that. Then ask for more next time! The worst they can say is no and offer less. They rarely will give more than you ask unless they were planning to give you a raise anyway.

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Hi! Actually, my manager hasn't gotten back to me yet. But he reacted really positively to my request and said he'd do the best he could to get me a raise. I was honestly a little afraid of his response because I've had a manager in the past who tore into me as a person for even thinking of requesting such a thing. So this is already a step in the right direction, methinks.

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It’s a shame nerves got in the way at the end. BUT you asked. Not only have you had a successful year, but you have also learned how to understand your value (with the research you mentioned) and you followed through on asking for the raise, in a tough economic environment. These are skills that will be in your back pocket for every future salary negotiation! Well done!

Are you happy with the amount you got, even if it’s not as much as you had intended to ask for?

If not, you can always say you were mindful of the economic uncertainty when asking for the amount, but that your research points to your value elsewhere being XX. As you’re committed to the company and enjoying the role, you don’t want to look outside for that and you’re happy to accept the rate you’ve already agreed but you’d appreciate setting a timeline for the next pay review. Maybe set some KPIs for six months with a pay bump associated.

But if you’re pretty content with the number, enjoy your role and your new salary. Money isn’t everything.

likeuplifting

Thank you for the great advice! They haven't gotten back to me yet, so I'll keep your idea in my back pocket.

Asking for more money can be hard - the rejection sucks if you don’t get it, and it feels risky.
Thing is, even if you ask for what you want and they give it to you, you’re going to then wonder if you could have asked for more and gotten it. It’s the way the mind works; it’s the hamster wheel of competition. Don’t beat yourself up - be proud you were bold, and know that if you’ve done it once, you can do it again b

likehelpful

You're absolutely right. There's no point in constantly raising the bar higher on myself, and have no idea if my colleagues even tried or if they will succeed. Thank you for your kind words.

You did something so hard!! Be proud and go celebrate! (And take notes so that next time you feel more confident!)

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Definitely celebrate it. You deserve it. It’s hard stepping out of your comfort zone!

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Thank you for the kind words, everyone. It really made me feel better about the outcome of my meeting and look forward to the next time I'll have the chance to be brave and try again!

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