Women In Consulting

Ladies, I found my boyfriend of close to 4 years pooping while there was a naked women in the shower. I was so hurt and disrespected and he admitted fault. I don’t know what to do in this situation.

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works at

I had to come back to this thread because it’s so insane. THIS 👏🏼 IS 👏🏼 NOT 👏🏼 NORMAL 👏🏼 oh my god

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likefunnysmart
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Agreed on that! The responses are more shocking than the original post where OP at least sensed something was off in this situation, whether real or not 😂

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In what world does a women let a man who is someone else’s boyfriend into the bathroom to POOP (of all things) while she is in the shower?!

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likesmart
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Lmao same. No thank you. Boundaries Keep the magic alive!!

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I’d be way more creeped out by the fact that he couldn’t wait to use the bathroom until she was done. Did he even ask her if that was ok?? If I was in the shower and some dude just walked in and started pooping I’d be completely grossed out! I’d be grossed out even if it was my live-in BF. Some things just need to remain private, IMHO.

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That is... so weird. Why were either of them comfortable with this situation?? Did he tell you or did you have to confront him about it? Was he defensive or apologetic? Have any red flags come out of this relationship before? This is a tough situation, but these questions might point to a larger issue depending on the responses.

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I have a problem with a man who says he “didn’t think twice”. What other situations will he not think twice???? 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

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This thread is hilarious! Such a niche situation. OP I’m on the camp of it’s fine (however weird the situation was - I do have a lot of questions around the showering bff, did she know he was coming in? Was she cool being naked around him? Was she cool with him pooping in the same room as him? 😂😂) If it helps my husband has a super closer female BFF. I’d regularly walk into his room and find him lying in his bed with her (not doing anything, just chatting, almost using his bed as a sofa). Used to freak me out each time. Fast forward 12 years and they are still bffs but she has her own husband and a kid, and it’s been plutonic the whole time.

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Confused how some people think this is okay...? If I put myself in the bff's position, the only way I can see myself being okay with it and staying in the shower instead of getting out is if there was something there and our relationship was just that close. Idk about y'all, but even if it was my female bff I'd feel uncomfortable showering while someones taking a dump and staring at me

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likefunny
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I mean. It could be nothing.. looking does not mean he’s cheating or has cheated. It is an awkward situation where he actually went in there when she was in there (why was she in there again and why wasnt the door locked?) But just looking does not mean anything my girl. I know you’re hurting but I don’t think there is any need to be hurt. It’s not like they were making out in the shower. He acted like an immature sure, but you are choosing to overthink this when you said he’s been faithful for 4 years. I mean, i would not overhink this if I were you. If he admits fault and apologies, then please move on. What’s seething over this gonna do for you?

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likehelpful
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This made me laugh. So cool you allowed a friend to stay with you. He probably really had to go and yea he’s a guy so he probably looked at her in the shower, get over it. Bigger issues you could have in your relationship

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Wait why is anyone telling you to let this go?? This is fucking WEIRD and I would be upset...

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🚩 He was looking at her! How creepy is that? I would be super uncomfortable and question my relationship if my bf did that! Like why can’t you wait for 2 min and ask the friend to come out of the bathroom for this emergency?

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Unless he’s already seen her naked..but you see where I’m going with thi

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likesmart
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Okay someone has to clear up the whole thing. Was the shower separated by a opaque curtain or stained glass or clear glass?? It’s 100% weird if it was not a shower curtain, alright. It’s like she’s changing in front of him naked and it’s perfectly okay with him. Which says a lot of about their relationship

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I hope OP is doing alright tbh, that’s honestly a really awkward convo to have and to be in that situation where the best friend is literally right there for the weekend. I would struggle to be nice and happy to both of them for the remainder of her stay..

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Thanks for everyone’s opinion. I get everyone’s point of view that’s why I let this one go but couldn’t help and feel so upset and uncomfortable. I would never want to be doing with another men just out of respect for my significant other. There are clear boundaries a men and woman needs to have. I’ve never liked how close he was with his girl best friend .. maybe an insecurity...

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likesmart
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You are totally right to be uncomfortable. Keep your eye out on this woman. I dont trust her. Shes out to get him.

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The fact that both of them were normal is weird. If it was extreme situation, it would imply one-off situation and he would have had to explain/plead with friend.

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Full story. I was cooking us lunch and my bf really needed to poop and we only had one bathroom. His girl best friend was visiting and was in the shower. I realized it was quiet so I walked towards the bathroom which had the door open and saw him pooping and her in the shower. In that split second I saw that his eyes was directed towards the shower and not the door. It was awkward so I walked back and it broke my heart seeing that. He said that he didn’t think twice and he really needed to go and he was looking away the whole time which I know isn’t true because he would have looked and seen me. This is an odd one but so so uncomfortable. He have never cheated before and have been faithful. Have you been in a similar situation?

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likefunny
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So like, was there a curtain? Or was he straight up ogling her

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likesmartfunny
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Weird but maybe he just needed to go. Why is the girl best friend showering at your place?

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She is staying at our place for the weekend

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When you're in a serious relationship there has to be boundaries. Thats just me. I have guy friends but if my husband ever felt weird about it I'd address it right away and never make him feel that way.

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Ok I need more coffee. I interpreted the headline of this post as you walked in on your BF pooping in the shower with a naked woman.... 😳

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On the face of it, and my initial reaction, was to think, NBD. 1 BR, someone has to poop, etc. However, thinking further on this and in speaking with my husband about it, I thought I’d share our points of view. It’s one thing when you’re in college and drunk to have a night like this where everyone just laughs it off and moves on. From what you’ve described, it sounds like it isn’t so much of an issue with his needing to poop, but boundaries. You aren’t wrong to feel insecure about this relationship to an extent. Something is there - whether spoken or unspoken. I can’t imagine going to someone’s house as a guest and showering without locking the door. I also don’t understand him needing to go and just walking in while a guest is showering. The fact that neither of them had an issue with it should concern you. I get we all get caught doing things (which is what it sounds like you caught him doing) and trying to explain around it, but there is an aspect that both of them seem to lack some sense of boundaries as it relates to your relationship to him - or even just normal behavior. FWIW -my husband would never poop while I’m in the shower. He would find an alternate option like leaving the house.

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likehelpful
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So when he left to go poop you already knew she was in the shower, right? Doesn't sound like he was sneaking around or deceiving you, I understand the awkwardness/potential jealous feelings it could bring forward but doesn't sound like it should end a 4 year relationship

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likesmart
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He looked super embarrassed and apologized, he know it’s just plain WEIRD...not saying it could end it but it crossed boundaries

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Hi all. Everything is okay. My bf have tried to apologize time and time over. The shower window isn’t clear but can see shadows. Anyways, I’ve trusted him through the years and he have done many things to assure his loyalty. What happened, I hope, was him not thinking straight. He now understands that he needs to have clear boundaries.

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Wake upppppppppppppp!! Danger danger!!! Smell the smoke! So many women are trying to tell you

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