{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Ladies, I posted this in the singles bowl but also posting here - do you ask guys for medical reports before doing the deed for the first time? Is there a good way to ask so they don't get offended?", "post_id": "6042b95721edad0028222fba", "reply_count": 9, "vote_count": 5, "bowl_id": "59e88be7e2808e00149b0443", "bowl_name": "Women In Consulting" }

Ladies, I posted this in the singles bowl but also posting here - do you ask guys for medical reports before doing the deed for the first time? Is there a good way to ask so they don't get offended?

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I was clear with my last bf. Told him I need him to get tested since he’s been in multiple relationships. He was not happy but too bad. He was bragging about his sexual life before us. I also said I’m asking for my health and not offending him. Nothing wrong in asking at all.

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I usually just ask if they’ve been tested. I personally only get a phone call about my test results/not a piece of paper or anything

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This, I ask them when the last time they were tested. If it's not that recent, I ask if it's likely still up to date. Asking for proof send a bit over the top. Relationships are based on trust.

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I have never asked but I think as long as you don't come off accusatory, it's fine! Say you'll do the same so it's not a double standard :)

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I second you should be getting tested too if you’re asking!

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I personally haven’t asked (shame on me) but it’s definitely something I’ll be doing once I get back into dating. It’s important to have these conversations before having sex so there aren’t surprises in the future.

smart

It’s a normal thing to ask for your own protection and theirs. Don’t be hesitant. Plus, do you really want to deal with someone long-term who is offended by something like that?

smart

Always.

I ask them to get tested and share their report and offer to do the same. I know that someone that makes it a big deal or doesn’t want to do this is not a good match for me on a fundamentals level.

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