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Rising Star
Your man isn’t a baby, so don’t spoon feed him
Rising Star
Okay so then ask him what’s keeping him from converting his tries to successes, how you can help enable that, and work out a plan to get ‘er done
“If you don’t do it, I do it. Do you want me to do everything? If so, listen to that aloud. You aren’t sleeping with your mother. You’re sleeping with me. I didn’t sign up for that shit.” And then just a bunch of “if you don’t do it, I do it — it’s not that it wouldn’t get done. You’re choosing to force me to do something. That is selfish.”
Hahaha I usually just ask! I say can you put the cups back in the dishwasher by the end of the day? (State what needs to happen, where it needs to happen, and by what time) and explain that it's important to you to keep the level of cleanliness for your sanity. Once he recognizes that this is something important to you and what you need it's not unreasonable for him to help
Rising Star
If you want it done a specific way do it yourself to be honest. If he is cleaning and doing chores but not to your perfect standard maybe some compromise is required or get over it.