{ "media_type": "text", "post_content": "Ladies-Given the expense of weddings and buying a condo/house, what are the expectations for engagement rings? Is bling still important? What should my budget be? 100k a year from a well off family", "post_id": "583ead99f3e3b800165d4b26", "reply_count": 72, "vote_count": 3, "bowl_id": "564a5cdb94887803001dd07c", "bowl_name": "Accounting" }

Ladies-Given the expense of weddings and buying a condo/house, what are the expectations for engagement rings? Is bling still important? What should my budget be? 100k a year from a well off family

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Mine was 2k all in. I love it. It's beautiful, one karat, and it fits my personality. I wouldn't want anything more expensive on my hand because I break things. I'd suggest browsing with your gf. She probably has an idea that this is coming, you can still make it a total surprise when you actually buy it. Costco has reasonable ish prices. Another option is buying the diamond separate from the setting and paying a jeweler to put the two together--custom ring, way less money. Remember: I diamond isn't a financial investment. It doesn't have resale value unless you can find someone gullible enough to believe that it does.

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It's always funny watching the single guys have discussions about engagement rings. The happiness floods away from their face when they talk about the cost they are going to spend. Don't be cheap, buy a good sized stone (all in for $10-15k is reasonable to me). My wife liked classic, single stone solitaire so I had a custom low set, knife edge setting made. The ring you purchase will be judged on your wife's finger (I love hearing how her friends or strangers compliment it)... Oh and if you are worried about a cost, cut the wedding and ask for that money to travel if your parents planned for one. That is a waste of time and money.

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Know the person you're proposing to. The ring I wanted was under $2k. I'd rather have the money to use on other things.

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Do not spend more than 10k on a ring. Save your damn money for the home.

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Costco is the real MVP

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Well size matters and you actually get to choose this size. Go big or go home

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Unless your ultra rich the notion of spending 25k on a ring is ridiculous. You could put that $25k in a safe, low risk investment for 25 years and cover a down payment for a house or a college tuition. Or travel the world with your soon to be spouse. If spending 25k means something to a woman, you're with the wrong one /end rant

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What would you ladies think if you were proposed to with a Costco ring?

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I am an unabashed supporter of selected " antiquated societal norms"

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Does she have a Pinterest board? If she's like any other girl she probably has a board of dream rings lol

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At BDO 2, PREACH!! Just buy a manufactured diamond for like $500. No one can tell. You know youre not buying blood diamonds, and you save money.

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Hey if she loves you, she'll still say yes

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My ring was 2k and I love it. We got it custom made. I drew out exactly what I wanted and we gave our jeweler a budget and he was able to make it exactly how I want with whatever we could afford or were willing to spend.

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My ring all in was $20k. My husband was excited to get me a ring that people compliment constantly and that i wasn't expecting (I'm still speechless that I have the beautiful ring that I do). It's something that I will wear every day for the rest of my life. So when you think about that, 20k isn't THAT ridiculous given our salaries (about 200k together). I mean, people gladly pay 30-50k for a car that they only drive for 5 years.

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It all depends on your bride to be. Get an idea of what she's always dreamed of and figure out if you can swing it. Most people I know in public have probably spent between $10k-25k on the ring (mine was right in the middle at $17k).

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So I just got back from lunch and have an update. I am so glad you told me to visit with her! Great advice!! She told me her parents have an heirloom diamond that she would prefer to wear. Her parents are wealthy but still less than mine . I think the thing is 4 carats. I am really down, as it is not about what our parents have but what we build together. I have some thinking to do before getting together again

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I think an heirloom is more about passed on tradition. You can design a new setting for the diamond that makes it new and symbolic of you two.

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Hm. I get what you're saying OP but there's a big difference between accepting a cherished heirloom ring handed down the generations and accepting major financial help from one's parents. It's not like her parents went out and bought that ring brand new and gave to you to give to her. Granted, if that's not the only issue that you don't see eye to eye on regarding parental involvement in your lives you should probably work that out before popping the question.

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It's not just size that matters either, just FYI. If it was a shitty diamond but it was 2.5 I'd still hate it

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I want to propose with one of those ring that come in the balls in the quarter machines at shop rite.

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I think the concept of a ring is a bit antiquated as well, in a world where we are striving for gender equality. My friends have asked their finances to buy them a similar priced Rolex to match the ring. Women want equal pay (which they should have), so why should men be burdened with antiquated societal norms?

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